So, let’s talk about it: the Britney Spears Sing-a-long at the Alamo Drafthouse. Yes. I went last Saturday night and it was pretty fantastic. I’d heard about it from a coworker, but pretty much everyone I know in Austin (read: 3 people) was busy with other raging Saturday night plans. I wasn’t sure if this […]
MoreI woke up, pissed as all hell. It was a Saturday morning, I’d slept in, and for some reason I was in a fit of rage. I was mad at the guy I’d been talking to, mainly because we weren’t really talking to each other anymore. Six months prior to this ugly Saturday morning, I […]
MoreI recently became obsessed with podcasts. There’s about six that I listen to regularly, including “The Jillian Michaels’ Show”. You may remember Michaels as one of the trainers on “The Biggest Loser”. Her podcast is a mix of fitness and health tips, along with life lessons and relationship advice. A few episodes ago, they had […]
MoreEvery other Friday, I take an alternate route home from the office. It’s a few miles west of where I live, toward a place Texans call Hill Country. And it is beautiful. The road overlooks dozens of homes made of stucco, usually sitting under a colorful sunset. If you’re new here, you should know that […]
MoreThe following was written based on memories (many of which involve vodka). Names have been changed to protect the author. Catch up on parts one, two, three, and four here. Eric’s message was loaded, and it upset me so much, it was difficult to unpack. But let’s do it, right here: I was not jumping to […]
MoreBa-da-da-da-da!!!! Today is kitty Blanche’s 3rd birthday, so naturally, Blanche and I are sleeping off our raging hangovers (she’s 21 in cat years now, y’all). No, actually, I’m at work and Blanche gets to stay at home, living the life of luxury all day. Lucky duck! To celebrate, Blanche got a special helping of soft […]
MoreHelloooooo! It’s been a hot minute since I featured two of my favorite pieces of this blog: “Celeb Crush” and a “Boyfriend Recipe”, so I figured why not combine the two for something steamy, plussss…. did I mention I have a giveaway? A FREE FOOD giveaway?! Yes!! But before we get into that fun stuff, […]
MoreRecently, MTV premiered season five of “Catfish”, the show that’s become synonymous with online dating failures. “Catfish” was introduced to the world in 2010 as a documentary, starring Photographer Nev Schulman. The film followed Schulman as he indulged in an online relationship with someone across the country, after “meeting” on Facebook. In the film, his […]
MoreI’ll be honest with you, I thought the podcast was dead. Remember when they first came out? If not, it was 2004, and McDonald’s (yummm) was the first to utter the word via print publication (The Guardian newspaper). Podcasts debuted in conjunction with iPods, because people were using their iPods to listen to and create […]
MoreThat’s right, before this weekend, I hadn’t seen “The Breakfast Club” in its entirety. I knew the general plot, and had seen parts of it, but never actually paid attention to it. So on Saturday morning, I started watching it before I headed out for the day. I was excited to see it, given it’s […]
MoreEarly last week, I randomly decided to join Periscope – the live video social media platform. I didn’t have much of a reason for joining other than I wanted to see what it was all about. I’ve heard of people (mostly celebrities or well-known personalities) using the ‘scope for an interview-like setting. Why? Well, because […]
MoreMy great friend Sheena agreed to write a review of “Fuller House” for The Bitter Lemon in trade for SnapChats of me singing the theme song. So, I present to you, a complete review of “Fuller House”: I know I can’t be the only one that rushed home Friday evening (read: left work early) to […]
More“We’re selfish, so all we want is a girl who’s going to listen to everything we say and act like it’s the coolest thing ever.” A guy friend of mine was trying to explain the inner-workings of the male brain to me. I’d just heard on the radio that the #1 reason a man will […]
MoreLast week, MTV premiered season 5 of “Catfish” – the show we all know, and have subsequently turned into a verb. If you live under a rock, I’m not sure why you’d be seeking my blog for news and advice, but a Catfish is someone who lies about their identity and often fakes multiple relationships […]
MoreIf Saturday was the official “Love Hangover”, then Sunday was a performance hangover. Let me back this train up and explain. You may or may not recall that I’m making a big effort to step outside of my comfort zone and do more things alone because, well because I don’t know anyone, and I’m not […]
MoreIt’s FRI-DAAAAAY! If you’ve been here all week, I really hope you’ve enjoyed the blog’s fun little twist. I really had a blast writing these posts and I’m so excited for all of the fun, HONEST content that’s coming your way. But enough business talk, and let’s get to the real shit: it’s the freakin’ […]
MoreIntroducing… drumroll… Blanche’s Book Club! I have been thinking for a few months that maaaaybe I should join a book club. After all, it would serve as a way to meet people AND read a few books. But then I realized, finding the right book club actually takes work, and what if they read books […]
MoreAbout two weeks ago, John Mayer announced he was joining SnapChat. The interwebs completely ATE this up, because: 1. SnapChat is for teens, right? And John Mayer is 38. And 2., What happened to all of that jazz about not making a complete fool of yourself online, Mr. Mayer? Well, hell’s bells. I’m 30 and […]
MoreThat’s right, I’m here to apologize… for being inauthentic. Don’t worry, I haven’t lied or covered up any big secrets, I just sort of realized that some of the things I’ve been writing about lately have gotten away from the true mission of this blog. And I’m stopping the madness before it gets any further. […]
MoreOkay, so who am I kidding? Obviously your guess is as good as mine when it comes to what the hell is going to happen in Season 5 of “Girls”, but it premiers THIS Sunday night, so let’s get to guessing! Here’s what I do know: when we left off in season 4, Shoshanna takes […]
MoreInstead of it being a “Woman You Should Know”, today it’s more about a Women’s Brand You Should Know, because I sat down with Ashley Stewart, just one of the founders behind The Patent Pump, an all-female powerhouse for branding (located in Baton Rouge, LA) that just reached its two-year anniversary. Very cool. So, here’s […]
More“What happened to the days of dating someone just because you liked them?” One of my best girlfriends and I were chatting one night about guys; not an uncommon occurrence with us. It was an interesting question, and truthfully, one I hadn’t thought of. But once my mind started to dive into the subject, she […]
MoreI realize I talk a lot about being a recluse and spending my weekends indoors, and well, part of this is because I find great joy in relaxing at my home, in my sweat pants. Another thing is that, since I’m working all week, I spend a majority of my weekend writing, reading, or attempting […]
MoreHello! Monday is back again, but I’m here to lighten things up with a slew of life lessons I have learned from watching the hilarious show, “Workaholics” on Comedy Central. I came across this show randomly about a year ago, and have anticipated every episode since. If you’re not regularly watching, you’ll want to jump […]
MoreMany years ago, I bought a plum lip pot from Victoria’s Secret (similar item here). It was so dark in the little jar, but when you put it on, it was sheer, yet bold. I used it up quickly, because it was an incredibly luxe gloss that I absolutely loved. Ever since, I’m always on […]
MoreFirst thing’s first: I got new hair and I. DON’T. CARE. You know Chris Brown’s song, “Zero”? That’s my new theme song, ‘cuz that’s how manyyyy f*cks I give… That’s right, my new hair is sassy, but more importantly, it’s easy to style and it feels healthy. I was rocking the same haircut and color […]
MoreYeeeeehaawwww – here we are, yet again, on another fine Friday! The good news is you’ve made it through another week… and I have no bad news because it’s FRIDAY. Between work and dance classes, the weeks seem to fly by pretty fast, but the weekends speed right on as well. This weekend, I’m really […]
MoreThe “Winter Blues” are a real thing (often referred to by smarter people as Seasonal Affective Disorder), and I’m here to report that there’s a way to rid yourself of these doldrums and turn that frown upside-down! Truth-be-told, I got to thinking about things that make me happy, and things that make other people happy. […]
MorePeople often say, “When you’re not looking, that’s when it’ll happen.” These people are usually in a relationship. I get it – just when you’re busy getting your life together instead of obsessing over dating, Mr. or Mrs. Right could be eyeing you from afar. It makes sense, but the most difficult thing for me […]
MoreEver notice that my Monday posts are about alcohol? Perhaps it’s because I’m fresh off a weekend of partying (not really), that I really don’t want to go back to the office (maybe), or that I just have a drinking problem (perhaps), in general. Eh, who really cares? Last week, I was super jealous of […]
MoreIt’s FRIDAY! I’ve been feeling a bit under the weather this week, so it’s been a struggle to keep up with work, dance, and well, all the other writing shenanigans I’ve got up my sleeve, but I freaking made it! Monday night was the first OFFICIAL dance practice for my performance at the end of […]
MoreMy best friend and I were sipping wine, while letting clay masks harden on our faces, and we got to talking about guys we’ve slept with. She said someone she knew had slept with 80 guys, and I was shocked at first, but then I started thinking about my own number. Before I ever had […]
MoreA few weeks ago, I signed up for Green Chef, an organic food supplier that delivers fresh, ORGANIC ingredients right to your doorstep, along with instructions on how to make delicious meals. Well, I got my first delivery Friday, and it has proven itself to be a 15-pound box of organic goodness! I have been […]
MoreIf you’re lucky enough to have today off, I’m jealous. But, maybe it’ll give you a chance to whip up a treat for the man in your life, and his best friend – his dog! Even though I’m currently bitter on the guy situation, I’m NOT suggesting men are dogs and we should bake them […]
MoreI am SO, SO happy today is Friday! This week at the office was a doozy, and I’d be lying if I haven’t been emotionally drained sorting out my own emotions simultaneously – you ever have weeks like that? I’m really looking forward to a weekend on the couch, only emerging for trips to the […]
MoreIt’s Thirsty Thursday (uh, so what if I’m 9 years out of college…), so let’s be adult about one thing and NOT have a hangover tomorrow! That’s what we call t-e-a-m-w-o-r-k. For years, my girlfriend and I have been hosting “Ladies Night,” which basically means we eat delicious food, watch trashy TV, and drink multiple […]
MoreLast year, meaning 2015, I was really sucking when it came to my dating game. So this year, I’ve made it a goal to make a better effort in putting myself out there. Well, we’re barely two weeks into the New Year, and I’ve already been on a date! How’s that for good luck? On […]
MoreI’m not necessarily a fan of “Year in Review”-type things, but man, I feel like 2015 was pretty CRAZY for me! Looking back at all of my ‘Pic of the Week’ photos, I recall, that not only did I move a solid 7 hours away to a new city, get a new job/career, and a […]
MoreGiven that I did about ZERO reading in 2015, I only asked for one book for Christmas, and it wasn’t even a novel. Instead, I asked for a cookbook, particularly Haylie Duff’s “The Real Girl’s Kitchen,” which serves as a companion to her TV series on the Cooking Channel. Upon getting with the times and […]
MoreA good girlfriend of mine introduced me to the Myers-Briggs Trait Indicator test years ago. She knows the different types so well, a night out with her often results in discovering what personality traits people in the room have. It’s fascinating. Her knack for these traits have made her a beneficial matchmaker for me in […]
MoreI really don’t have any great pictures that represent my travels this weekend – it’s very likely that I was having such a good time, I didn’t pick up my phone. But I traveled north and visited some friends from high school, and got to meet my best friend’s baby (cutest baby ever, seriously). It […]
MoreWhoop — first blog of 2016! I thought it would feel more weird writing that number, but I feel like I’ve had my eye on 2016 for awhile now. Perhaps it’s just because a majority of my 2015 totally sucked. But it’s a fresh year, and although I feel like I make New Years goals/resolutions […]
MoreOkay folks, it’s New Year’s Eve, and if you’ve been around The Bitter Lemon for a bit, you know I’m not too big on NYE festivities. I don’t exactly know why – I think the main thing that bothers me is that everyone is out to make it the #BestNightEver …and then it just ends […]
MoreLast week, I got into a bit of an argument with the guy I’m seeing. Okay, so we haven’t gotten into the logistics of our relationship yet, but we are basically seeing each other. He’s very easy going, and while I’d consider myself comfortable in that same category, I’ll admit it, I’m not quite as […]
MoreMy Pic of the Week is of me, and if you couldn’t guess from how similar we look, my beautiful mom! She flew to Austin from Indiana to visit me for the entire week of Christmas, and we really did a lot of fun things while she was here. I had to work on that […]
MoreHey gang! Anyone else back at work today? I am, and I can already tell it’s not going to be an easy few days before we get another long weekend (how spoiled do I sound right now?). Anyway, I feel like I’m being annoying and beating this course over your head, but this will be […]
MoreIt should come as NO surprise that the holiday season has got me thinking back (pretty sure I love to live in the past). But the interesting thing is that it was a little candle I got in the mail that really sent me down memory lane. A few weeks ago, there was a tea […]
MoreIs it just me, or has it been incredibly difficult to get into the holiday spirit this year? I feel really old when I say, “It’s crept up on me this year,” yet I keep saying it. I blame my Scrooge-like spirit partly on the weather, given that it’s going to be in the 70s […]
MoreI know I’ve mentioned a few times that it’s been difficult for me to get into the Christmas spirit this year — and hey, I’ll probably mention it at least once more before Friday. Deal with it. But, I think this happens to me every single year. Sometimes, I’ll go the entire season without feeling […]
MoreWhether you’re spending the holidays with family, friends, or both, the chances are likely you’ll need a cocktail to get through one more round of dominos with the grandparents or flip through that dusty photo album with your mother-in-law, for the 11th time. Or, maybe you’re like me, and looking for any excuse to get […]
MoreI KNOW there’s a ton of you out there who are SO amped it’s Friday — teachers, worker-folk, I’m sure you’re all ready for the 5 o’clock hour to strike so you can race out the door to not waste a MINUTE of your holiday break. And I don’t blame you one bit. I do […]
MoreSince moving, I’ve been anxious to get back on some sort of plan to tone up, and per usual, it hasn’t been easy. I joined a dance studio and have gotten into a pretty good routine of going to classes four times each week. And although that’s good (plus it’s a really fun way to […]
MoreThe holidays are here and that means one thing: DRINKS! Okay, so maybe it’s like that ALL year ’round, but let’s pretend like we’re not all functioning drunks, K? Delish.com has put together a list of wines that you’ll love, according to your zodiac sign. And, I’m not sure what the information is based off, […]
MoreI had every intention of posting a sexy little fiction piece today, but when I got out of my dance class (Twerk and Burn) last night, my passenger’s side window had been shattered. The bastard was after an old (very old) Coach laptop bag, and although inside the bag wasn’t a laptop (thank God), there […]
More“It’s only ever happened one time in my entire life.” My hip-hop dance instructor, Dimitrius, was trying to explain to me that he’s been in a serious relationship for most of his life. For the sake of this column, we’re going to assume that he was single at birth, but probably found another cute baby […]
MoreIs it just me, or is this holiday season just FLYING by? I feel like everything is coming up so fast and I’ve got so much to do before it’s over! Nonetheless, it all starts with putting up the Christmas tree, right? Yes. I think every year, that maybe THIS year, I won’t put up […]
MoreAlmost 100 days ago, many of you sent your well wishes my way when I announced I was starting a new job (again, thank you). And last Wednesday, I completed my “Capstone presentation” at said job — meaning I’ve completed all of my SEO training and am in this gig for good (or at least […]
MoreThat’s right, I’ve got cellulite. While it has an oddly nice ring to it, I freaking haaaaate it! I’ll be honest here, I’ve really never had body issues until the last year or so. Part of it came from being a gym rat, and getting obsessive over what I ate and how often I hit […]
MoreI was going to write about lies — how often we lie and why we do it, and of course, how it affects our relationships. But as I type this, I’ve locked myself into my bedroom and am impatiently waiting to hear a victorious “snap!” of a mousetrap. Let me explain. I am expecting company […]
MoreThe fact that Thanksgiving is over and it’s the official holiday season has me feeling kind of anxious — I feel like time is just FLYING by! I truly hope you had a fantastic Thanksgiving, as my weekend was such a fun one thanks to my friend Sheena for driving across the country to come […]
MoreRemember last week? Last week, when I was so excited to join Operation Turkey (the North Austin branch) and hundreds of volunteers to serve thousands of homeless people? Well, the actual experience completely blew. Here’s what happened… After I signed my friend and I up for the volunteer job (for which I signed us up […]
MoreThanksgiving is my favorite holiday. I love the fall weather, a few days off from work, and of course, the food. I love to cook (especially for a guy), I really like to eat, and the fact that pigging out is perfectly acceptable for this holiday is just the whipped topping on my pumpkin pie. […]
MoreYES! Thanksgiving is the day after tomorrow! I went shopping for my feast last night and I’m SO excited about all the delicious food I’ll be chowing down on Thursday. Below is the menu… and don’t let me fool you, I pretty much bought everything already prepared. Turkey breast & drumsticks Cornbread stuffing Green beans […]
MoreY’all… it’s FRIDAY!! The exciting thing about THIS Friday is that for most of us, next week is a short week, then we get a looooong weekend. I cannot really explain how happy this makes me. I’ve felt so stressed this week; stressed over things that are out of my control (isn’t that the worst), […]
MoreA few weeks ago, my favorite radio show, “Johnjay and Rich,” got to talking about red flags in dating. Now, red flags are nothing new, but a lot of the red flags they were talking about were silly — like, don’t date a guy if he wears cargo pants. If wearing cargo pants is the […]
MoreEvery time a new piece of technology, or a new social app, is introduced into our world, I try to find a way to wiggle it into my routine. Unless it’s not worth it, of course. I downloaded SnapChat (@OrangeJulius7) around six months ago, at the suggestion of a younger friend. “All the cool kids […]
MoreI seriously spent this ENTIRE weekend adulting. On Thursday, I woke up to the reality that Thanksgiving was just TWO weeks away — and between now and then, I’ve got a TON of shit to do, from work tasks, things around the apartment, and just general LIFE shit. I felt incredibly overwhelmed, so I decided […]
MoreToday is the day that Beliebers and One Directioners can rejoice — as Justin Bieber AND One Direction released their NEW albums at midnight! Today may as well be Christmas, because we’ve (and by me, I mean all of us) been waiting for this day FOR-EV-ER. And okay, so there may be a little friendly […]
MoreIf you were ever worried that I’d run out of celebrity crushes, fear not my friends. Lately, I’ve noticed that I go through crushes pretty quick. My crushes in real life never like me back, so it leaves me to the only alternative: loading up on celeb crushes and hoping one day ONE of these […]
MoreWell, I realize that for a ‘Pic of the Week,’ this is a pretty subpar photo. I was too lazy to get on the ladder, and to be honest, I’m terrified of that damn ladder. But! I’m pretty proud of this little project I accomplished, so there it is. Assembled shelves that are now home […]
MoreFor some reason, I feel like I’ve done a pretty good job of hiding the fact that I’m a TV junkie… not sure HOW I was able to hide it (hell, maybe I haven’t), but I’m here to assure you, it’s true. I’m a TV junkie. I’d love to tell you that hey, it’s fall, […]
MoreHowdy! Whew, I’m SO happy it’s Friday! It’s been a crazy-busy week all around, and it flew by. It’s supposed to rain (again) in Austin this weekend, so if you’re following me on SnapChat (OrangeJulius7), be prepped for lots of couch-lounging-DVR-CSI-snaps, K? I officially joined Dance Austin this week, so I can attempt to whip […]
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