After being laid off for 51 weeks, today is the first day at my full-time job.
I think it’s going to take me a little while to get comfortable in this space. After all, it’s been nearly a year since I had a 9-5 schedule, where I got to work from home. My life changed so much during my time away, but I know being back is such a better place for me.
Since accepting this job offer, I’ve thought long and hard about how I wanted to share the news with you all. After all, you’ve been on this journey with me for years — not just in this last layoff, but even before that, when I was laid off during the pandemic lockdown.
I used to look at those two events separately, but now they’re the same in my brain, and they’ve caused a great deal of stress surrounding my career.
These setbacks have hurt me in so many ways, and I’d be lying if I didn’t feel a bit jaded by all of it. I felt like a victim of the times; was I always going to keep getting jobs and losing them without being able to grow in my career?
But, I used that experience and those feelings to drive my job search. I wanted to find a place that was doing something for the greater good, where I could learn and grow (for years), and I’m so relieved and grateful that I found it!
I know I’m not the only one navigating these waters, so I thought I’d share some lessons I learned along the way. Here goes:
Lesson 1: Having time to process being laid off is vital.
I can’t speak for everyone, but I know as soon as I was laid off, I was thinking about what I was going to do next. I wasn’t looking for full-time jobs right away, but I was scrambling to find freelance work or random projects.
I know doing this is vital for some — there’s a major financial burden of not having a job, of course — but this time, I learned how beneficial it can be if you breathe a bit. I did have a good amount of savings to help me, but I also got a part-time retail job that kept me busy and saved me from using all of my savings before I could find full-time work.
I’ve shared my thoughts on working retail extensively here, so I’ll just say that whatever the space looks like for you is worth considering. Maybe you bartend or pick up outdoor projects or open an Etsy Shop, but having the time away from my computer and Zoom meetings was a blessing.
Lesson 2: Staying productive is a way to ease stress.
I’m an enneagram 3, which means I find satisfaction in getting things done. This has positive and negative effects, but during this last year, I had to reframe what accomplishments looked like.
In my previous work, I collaborated with my teammates and was challenged by various writing assignments. Being laid off and looking for work, I kept busy with my retail job, but also via working on my Etsy Shop (which also gave me a lot of joy), collaborating on a podcast, attending screenwriting group meetings, and writing my weekly newsletter.
While, at times, juggling all of this stressed me out, it was important to me to keep doing the things that fueled me in other — mostly creative — ways. When I did get job interviews, these side projects also gave me something to talk about outside of my freelance work. I could show that not only am I creative and driven, but I’m also self-motivated!
Lesson 3: It is wise to guard what you share and to whom.
No matter the situation, there are always going to be people who cannot relate to what you’re going through. As much as I tried not to focus on others, it was hurtful noticing who wasn’t checking on me or inviting me to do things.
When my dad died in 2018, I heard people tell me that “not everyone knows how to act” when you’ve suffered a loss, and I’m sure the same could be true when it comes to a job loss. But in the age of Google, I refuse to accept this. You can absolutely ask Google how to be a good friend when someone gets laid off, and you’ll get step-by-step instructions on what to do!
But, when I started realizing that a whopping three people were there for me, I wondered if my suffering was simply entertaining for everyone else. So, I stopped sharing a lot of my job search (and anything related to it, including my retail job) on my social media. This mostly helped me put things into perspective and served as a reminder that my social media “friends” aren’t necessarily my real-life friends.
Lesson 4: Support comes from random corners.
Having said that, I was blown away by who reached out to help me find a job. Not only did previous coworkers offer their connections and advice, but high school classmates and even distant acquaintances messaged me with support.
I was really touched by all of it, and I was so grateful that nearly ALL of the interviews I got were because of people reaching out and putting in good recommendations. Not only did this give me hope, but I was able to practice interviewing and talking about my career experience and goals. It sounds like a no-brainer, but it’s so easy to fall out of the professional world when you’re not in it five days a week.
Lesson 5: Focusing on gratitude puts things into perspective.
When times got really tough (and when money was feeling tight), I made lots and lots of gratitude lists in my journal. No matter how bad it may have gotten, I knew that I was blessed in many forms, and that I was going to figure out a way to make the change I needed.
I’ve had a regular journaling practice for years now, and I always rely on gratitude to ease my anxiety. The truth is, we likely have everything we need to survive already, and it’s up to us to keep moving forward. Focusing on gratitude is a tool I’ll use for the rest of my life.
Lesson 6: Imposter Syndrome is real, but what it’s telling you is not.
I’d heard of Imposter Syndrome, but I didn’t experience it until this year. I truly felt like a fraud, and sometimes I even wondered if I actually had the experience I said I did on my resume. It sounds wild, but that’s truly how I felt.
To combat these feelings, I kept having to remind myself that yes, I did have the experience I said I did (I actually lived it) but I was also up against hundreds of thousands of other tech-industry professionals who’d been laid-off just like me. I also knew that, on some level, it wasn’t working out with these jobs for a reason, even if I couldn’t see it quite yet.
Lesson 7: Believing in your purpose is what wins in the end.
Now that my job search journey has ended in such a positive way (thank God), I know that all roads were pointing to this outcome. I had specific traits I was looking for in a job and I have goals for my career that needed to align in a certain way; in the end I got what I wished for.
Truthfully, I learned so much about myself in this last year — stuff that has nothing to do with a job or my career — and I know believing in myself and my purpose (for living) is the only thing that helped me persevere.
Please know that, although things may look buttoned-up here on the blog or in the newsletter, I certainly battled loads of stress, anxiety, and depression in this last year. I definitely was not jumping out of bed every day, applying to hundreds of jobs with a smile on my face.
At times, I cried on my drive to my retail job, and on my drive home, I’d question why this was my life. I’d quickly go back to gratitude and just be thankful for any sort of paycheck, the food in my fridge, and a safe place to sleep. I gave myself a push when I needed it, but I also let myself wallow when necessary.
If you’re finding yourself in a tough season of life, remind yourself that it’s temporary. And if you know someone going through a rough patch, invite them over for dinner, please.
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