I was really questioning whether I should post anything about this case, but the more I’ve seen and read about it, how could I not? This case – The Stanford Rapist (I will not glorify his name or former accolades here) vs. The Victim – and its ruling affects women everywhere, and it has made me incredibly angry and emotional over these last few weeks.
In the last year, the general conversation over rape culture and sexual consent has finally started to come out from the bottom shelf, and it’s made me think a lot about the men of my past and the experiences that have shaped my views on sex. While I am lucky enough to not have been in a situation quite like The Victim’s in this case, I will say that it’s not been a bed of roses.
To explain one instance among many, my best friend and I attended a frat party during our freshman year in college. We were drinking, and dancing with many of the different fraternity brothers, and one in particular was swinging us around, laughing with us.
Less than one month later, his name was in the paper as he’d been charged with sexual assault, in a very similar situation we’d witnessed that night. He was accused of drugging a woman at a party. That very well could have been my friend, or me, or someone else I knew. And I know I’m not the only one who’s been that close to being The Victim.
And so, I’ve got 27 questions surrounding this case – because I’m truly left dumbfounded.
- Why are we referring to someone who was removed from a University as a University athlete?
- Who cares about his athletic statistics?
- Why did the judge play favorites?
- Does the judge have a daughter?
- What would the ruling be if the rapist were black?
- What would the ruling be if the rapist never went to college?
- Why is the rapist getting away with, not only rape and assault, but also underage drinking?
- Why isn’t Stanford addressing their fraternity culture?
- Why aren’t we talking more about how the rapist lied about using drugs in the past?
- Why are we okay with blaming this on alcohol?
- Why do we assume that women are more likely to lie about being raped?
- Why didn’t he take ANY blame for what he did?
- Why is his father referring to rape as “20 minutes of action”?
- Why did the rapist treat The Victim like literal trash?
- Why is the rapist already getting out of jail early?
- Why was the judge worried about what happened to the rapist?
- What would the ruling be if it was the same judge, same rapist, plus a murder?
- Why are women taught how to stay safe against rape but men are not taught to stop raping women?
- Why do men think women were put on this earth for only their enjoyment?
- Why do we celebrate rape in pop culture (I’m talking to you, 50 Shades)?
- Why did the rapist use “she agreed to come back to my dorm room” as an excuse?
- Why would we accept that as consent?
- What is keeping the rapist from doing this again, again, and again?
- How does the rapist’s mom feel about this?
- How would the rapist’s mom feel if it had happened to her in college?
- What does this teach prestigious frat guys everywhere?
- How are we supposed to live without fear when this is our justice system?
Unfortunately, the judge in this case began his new term on Tuesday, as he ran unopposed. To get involved in his recall, click here.