On Friday, I heard Brody Jenner got engaged, and although this isn’t the FIRST time he’s been seriously in love – we all knew that whole Avril Lavigne thing wasn’t going to last… or at least, we really hoped it didn’t, and thank God it didn’t. But this one, this engagement to the gorgeous blonde model Kaitlyn Carter, seems like it’s pretty real. Because of course.
And yeah, I have always thought Brody Jenner was fine as hell. So, to ease the pain, let’s talk about food, and… do a food GIVEAWAY! Hells yeah!
But first, Brody. And the fact that once they get married, his wife’s name will be Kaitlyn Jenner. Hmm. Awkward.
Jenner got his TV start on “The Princes of Malibu” which starred him, and his brother, as well as his mom Linda Thompson and his former stepdad, David Foster… as in, the David Foster, who just dumped poor Yolanda. Like… I totally did not know this relationship ever happened.
And then he was on “The Hills” and I guess dated Kristin Cavallari and Lauren Conrad, although he said in a later interview that he never slept with anyone on “The Hills”…erreeeeaaallly? He was also dating Playmate Jayde Nicole while on later seasons of “The Hills”.
And then came Avril, and that was two years of complete oddness, and terror when she moved in and stole our hearts and our hot guy. Why you have to go and make things so complicated, Avril?!
Then in 2014, he started dating Kaitlyn, and was really open with the press about how great their sex life was, because she’s open to threesomes. Le sigh. THIS IS WHY IT’S NEVER GOING TO HAPPEN FOR ME.
But that’s besides the point. Let’s say Brody Jenner is still single, and he’s coming over for dinner, what would I cook for him? I’m going with Beef Picadillo from Green Chef.
I made this recipe about a month ago and was pleasantly shocked at how delicious it was, given it’s array of different ingredients. I know Brody has probably had some high-class, fancy shit on his plate, but I get the feeling he’s open for just about anything. So, we’re going with it.
INGREDIENTS
- Organic grass-fed seasoned ground beef
- Organic garlic, onion, poblano chile & green bell pepper
- Organic raisins & almonds
- Organic green olives & capers
- 1 15-ounce can organic fire-roasted crushed tomatoes
- Chile seasoned masa
- 10-12 sprigs organic parsley
- 1 ounce Cotija cheese, crumbled
- 1 organic zucchini
Mince garlic. Cut root end off onion and remove peel. Small dice into about ¼-inch pieces. Medium dice poblano chile and green bell pepper into about ½-inch pieces. Cut ends off zucchini. Medium dice into about ½-inch pieces; reserve. Destem parsley. Roughly chop leaves; set aside.
Heat about 1 ½ tablespoons olive oil in a large sauté pan (with lid) over medium heat. Add garlic and onion to hot pan. Season with salt and pepper. Cook 3-4 minutes, or until onions are translucent, stirring occasionally. Add poblano and bell pepper. Cook 3 minutes, stirring occasionally.
Add seasoned ground beef to pan with veggies. Stir to break up. Cook 5 minutes, or until browned, stirring frequently. Roughly chop green olives and capers. Add to pan. Cook 2 minutes.
Add fire-roasted crushed tomatoes to pan with picadillo. Add raisins and almonds; stir. Reduce heat to medium-low and cover. Simmer 8-10 minutes, or until liquid reduces by at least a quarter, stirring occasionally. Salt and pepper to taste.
Meanwhile, place chile-seasoned masa in a medium bowl. Add about ½ teaspoon salt and ⅔ cup water. Mix thoroughly until a stiff dough forms and pulls away from sides of bowl (see Pro Tip). Form dough into four patties, about ½-inch thick.
Pro Tip: If dough is too dry to come together, add water in tablespoon increments to reach ideal consistency.
Heat about 1 ½ tablespoons cooking oil in a medium nonstick pan over medium-high heat. Add masa cakes to hot pan. Cook 3 minutes on each side, or until lightly browned.
Meanwhile, heat about 1 ½ tablespoons cooking oil in a medium sauté pan over medium-high heat. Add zucchini to hot pan. Season with salt and pepper. Cook 3-4 minutes, or until tender, stirring occasionally.
Divide beef picadillo between plates. Pile sautéed zucchini next to picadillo. Shingle two masa cakes on the side. Sprinkle with parsley and Cotija cheese. Enjoy!
And that, my friends, is what I’d like to give away today: organic ingredients for meals delivered right to your door, for FREE! I’ve been ordering from Green Chef for about four months now, and I love it. You get to choose how many meals (by meal they mean serving) you want delivered, and set your preferences. You can change your food preferences as often as you want, or skip weeks if you’re not feeling it, and there’s NO penalty for it.
I generally have my preferences set on “omnivore” and I get ingredients for 6 meals each week; however, most of the time, it ends up being enough ingredients for 9 meals. Usually the box (which is right on my doorstep and packed with ice packs) has two recipes with meat, and one vegetarian.
So, you’ll get the ingredients and then you cook the meals at your leisure. All of the ingredients are pre-measured, and organized with color-coordinated labels. Some of the ingredients are even prepped for you (chopped, mixed, etc.), so it makes the meals pretty fool-proof. But seriously, no catch with the free meals – I really just want other people to try this delicious stuff!
I have two free gifts to give away, so if you’re interested, shoot me your email address using the form at the bottom of this post. I’ll draw numbers tonight at 10pm Central time, and if you win, you’ll get an email from me with your code! If you don’t get an email from me, you can still get 4 free meals from Green Chef, using my code here.
The Bitter Lemon 