A Review: St. Tropez In-Shower Bronzer.

One thing I love about having my own blog is that when I find a new, cool product, I can tell you all about it, my experiences with it, and the best ways to use it. And since my blog is not sponsored in anyway, I can also tell you when a product sucks completely.

And today, that product is St. Tropez Gradual Tan In-Shower.

Let me back up a little here and say that I’ve used many different types of sunless tanners over the years. My first experience was when Bath & Body Works came out with their sunless tanner…remember that?

I remember it being a nice color and it smelled awesome, but my ankles always looked dirty and it was kind of orange-ish. But, I was also in 6th grade and I’m sure technology in the sunless tanning industry has improved since 1996.

I will also say that I have a history of using the tanning bed. I’ve used the tanning bed since high school, and I’ll admit I’ve probably done the worst types of things when it comes to taking care of my skin – purposely not using sun screen, or using regular lotion in the tanning bed instead of any type of tanning lotion or protective gear.

I just love a tan! Who doesn’t love a sun-kissed look, especially in the spring and summer months? But when I moved to Austin, I was (and still am) making an effort on cutting back my spending, which includes monthly bills for things like unlimited tanning packages.

So, even though I live ACROSS THE STREET from a tanning bed, I haven’t stepped foot inside. Instead, I’ve been on the hunt for the perfect sunless tan that will get me a little bronze until I can sit poolside each weekend (one of my favorite hobbies).

I got a sample of the St. Tropez Gradual Tan In-Shower in one of my monthly Birchboxes. The sample was probably about 3 ounces of product, so I was able to try it at least 3 times (I just used it on my legs).

Here’s how it works: You take a shower, turn the shower off, rub the tanner on your wet skin, rinse off your hands, wait in the shower for at least 3 minutes, and then turn the shower back on and rinse off the tanner.

Let’s get a few things straight. For starters, the whole concept is pretty awesome. I mean you can take care of everything right there in the shower – no risk of getting sunless tanner all over your white bathroom. Plus, you get to rinse the product off, so no worries about that.

But, think about it… how the hell WOULD this product even work?!? I mean you’re putting the lotion on top of wet skin, which seems like a giant mistake. Then, you only have to wait for three minutes. That’s like,  not even long enough to heat up dinner. And THEN, you rinse it off. There’s no way the product could work.

And as I mentioned, it didn’t. I don’t think I got even the slightest bit of color. I should have taken pictures, but I’m not that organized of a blogger, I admit.

Here’s the other little added layer of humor here with this particular tanner. When I was working full time retail early last year, I was secretly hunting for a full-time, salary job in my industry. I had an interview scheduled that overlapped with my work shift, so I lied and told my job I needed to take an extra long lunch for a doctor’s appointment.

“Sure, is everything okay?” my then-boss asked.

I felt terrible for lying over my health, so I at least tried to think of something not as serious. I told her I was just going to the dermatologist for an annual mole check.

Even though it was none of her business, she asked me if everything turned out okay when I returned for my next shift. I told her yes, and she was asking me if I’d ever had a scare with an irregular mole.

I am lucky to say that I haven’t, but I do know people that have and I know it’s very serious. Turns out, my then-boss had to have some skin removed, so she told me she strictly used sunless tanner. She said the St. Tropez looked incredibly natural.

Now, I believe she was referring to the foam version, and I haven’t tried that version, so I can’t speak on it. But, the St. Tropez line of products aren’t cheap. The In-Shower is $25 for a 6oz bottle.

I’m not upset over the product, I’m actually glad I didn’t buy it and was able to try the sample. I kind of forgot about the product and moved onto the next one (which I’ll blog about later), until I went to the hair salon.

I was talking with the stylist about spray tans and self-tanners, and she mentioned this exact product! I told her I didn’t like it and she agreed.

“Isn’t it weird to stand in the shower with no water running for 3 minutes?” she asked.

I laughed because that is absolutely the weirdest part about the product. I don’t have a clock in my shower, or even in my bathroom, so I never had a great way of telling when it had been 3 minutes. I started by washing my face with my Clarisonic – that shuts off after 1 minute, so at least I had 1/3 of the time down.

Other than that I would just stand there, and/or sway back and forth, naked, and wet like the next Intervention candidate, amirite?

So, there’s that. I’ll tell you about the second sunless tanner I tried on the next “Road Test” (it’s official, I need theme music). Until then, you guys have a great weekend – I’m going to another Texas Stars hockey game! Catch it all on SnapChat @ OrangeJulius7