Survival Guide: Single on Valentine’s Day.

The shitty thing about being single on Valentine’s Day, is that you’re supposed to have an opinion about Valentine’s Day.

So here’s mine: Screw. You.

I’m reminded every day that I’m single, you know, when I wakeup alone, when my phone never gets any text messages, and when I realize that I’m not annoyed 24/7—yep, I’m single!

I actually enjoy being single, especially lately, however this holiday that is so exclusive, makes me feel like I’m without.

And so, that survival guide…

  • Avoid scenes like this:
WTF is that on the top shelf? A heart-y snake?

WTF is that on the top shelf? A heart-y snake?

Not gonna lie, I could totally devour a chocolate heart right now.

Not gonna lie, I could totally devour a chocolate heart right now.

Oh, did I just make it worse? It’s never fun to do your regular grocery shopping and find yourself lost in what I like to call, “The Aisle of Red.” Maybe it doesn’t bother you, but unless you’re planning on buying yourself a pound of heart-shaped chocolates, I suggest you order takeout until February 15.

  • Steer clear of all things red. Either you’re in or you’re out when it comes to Valentine’s Day. So, either avoid everything associated with the holiday…
  • Or…get obsessed with it. If you can handle sitting amongst the couples this Friday, whether it’s at a restaurant or a movie, go for it. Throw on a hot pink shirt and go out like you mean it. Or stay inside and sleep until this awful holiday is past us.
  • Do you. Ultimately, I try not to say things like “Do You,” because aren’t we always doing that? But, I’ve found that on a day like February 14th, it’s best to do whatever you want. Want to wear all black with your middle finger up? Do you. Want to bake pink cupcakes for your coworkers and wear an entirely red outfit? Do you.

Last year was the first year I really abided by that last rule. I ordered myself a pizza, lit my digital fireplace, had some wine, and relaxed. And it was definitely the best Valentine’s Day I’d had in awhile.

So, take this Valentine’s Day as a chance to remind yourself just how awesome you are—you don’t need to be in a relationship to recognize that fact. Besides, if you WERE in a relationship, you’d probably get something dumb, like:

Peanut butter jelly time!

Peanut butter jelly time!

For what it’s worth, happy Valentine’s Day!

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Posted on February 10, 2014, in Light Pulp and tagged , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , . Bookmark the permalink. 1 Comment.

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