During winter break of my sophomore year, I was making notes for a relationship column I was writing. I wanted to write about Adam. Here is the notebook page I kept:
Holly A. Phillips
1.8.05
Column idea: Adam makes the move.
One of my best friends, Adam is finally coming onto me.
Several of my girlfriends said they saw it coming long ago. I, however, was completely shocked. Throughout our four years of friendship Adam has never shown any interest in me other than a friend. Until now.
What came of these notes was a column tackling the age-old issue: can men and women be “just friends”? My conclusion was no, and I went home for the summer—the summer Adam and I started dating. When I returned to campus for the fall semester, I wrote this column:
Relationships with Holly A. Phillips {published Monday, August 22, 2005}
Since June, I’ve enjoyed the perks from my favorite season. I’m not just talking about the hot sun; I’m talking about my summer love.
The three months between semesters make way for parties, concerts, movies and vacations—all ideal situations for relationships. But when it comes to a summer romance, there are several factors cluttering the anticipated love.
As college students, we spend our summers traveling to internships, international schools or back to our hometowns. This brings me to the downfall of a summer romance: the end of it.
Where will both people be when September rolls around? If the end of the summer means the end of the relationship, the entire fling is put on a three-month timer.
A timed relationship means one of two things. Both people might get caught up in the fact that there’s simply not enough time to accomplish a full-fledged love. This leaves the couple racing to the finish line.
On the other hand, it may bring up the question “what’s the point?” This is not the direction you should hope for. Chances are the relationship won’t continue after this issue arises.
But there are a few summer romances that were meant to end along with the warm weather. First off, there’s the vacation romance. This is the boy or girl you meet during your two weeks away from home.
The circumstances for this relationship are very different from any other. Because both people are away from home, chances are they’re simply looking for something—or someone—to do.
The timer for this fling is typically very short, leaving lovers wasting no time getting to know each other.
Of course, there are those summer romances that were just not meant to last.
Two summers ago, I fell for a small-town boy who played baseball and listened to country. He was not my type, but somehow it worked. When I had to leave Indiana for school, we had an unspoken understanding that it was over; we were not made for a long-distance relationship.
But how do you know if you should continue your summer love?
Feelings are, of course, the ultimate answer. If saying goodbye won’t be so hard, chances are the relationship wasn’t meant to last.
On the other hand, if you find that your heart is holding on, maybe it would be worth a try to keep things going.
I am happy to say that my summer love has not yet ended. But I still owe my relationship to the summer season—as it brought me back home to my best romance yet.
I hope I am not the on;y one who found love this summer. To everyone who found themselves a fling, I challenge you to keep it; because you just never know what the fall semester might bring.
The Bitter Lemon 