If Trump Wins: How to move to London.

Okay, GOP, I'M OUT.
Okay, GOP, I’M OUT.

I’m not really sure what the Republicans are thinking, but then again, when do I EVER know, or understand, or really care what’s going on there? Meh.

But in general, y’all have lost it. We put up with Bush. But Trump? No ma’am. That shit is no joke. Like I am moving overseas if this happens. So, if you’re on the same page as me, I’ve done the dirty work and figured out how to actually move to London, should the crazies take over.

Get a Visa

Not the credit card kind. If you’re a student, lucky you – visas are easier to get if that’s the case. You can also try and get one through your current employer, which is also fairly easy. For most of us though, we’ll have to prove we’ve got enough work experience and education to make the move without a job (unless, of course) you can land a job overseas first, and get a visa that way.

Visit here for more information about how to get a visa and exactly what kind you need.

Get a Flat

How chic does that sound? Start looking for a place; and yes, it’s going to be expensive. This means two things: 1. Don’t fall for any places that sound cheap, because they probably don’t exist, and 2. Don’t wire money over. You’ll get scammed. It’s also probably important to note here that places in London are going to be smaller, and will also have about zero storage. So, time to get rid of everything you own. Bad news for Blanche, London landlords are not keen on cats and dogs. Looks like Blanche will have to fend for herself when it comes to Trump.

Just kidding; we’ll find a place to house my arugula-eating kitty (though she may have to be quarantined for six months).

One important part of figuring out a place to live is exactly WHERE; there’s lots of boroughs in London and you’ve got to find the right one for you – here’s a map of them.


You can have your car shipped overseas, or you can get a new one once you arrive. But, keep in mind, that if you have a car either way, you’re going to have to find a place to park it. I saw screw the car, London has a great public transportation system.

And while all of this sounds fine and dandy, my research proved to me one thing: moving out of the country is not easy – and why would it be? Moving ANYWHERE is a pain in the ass and there’s all sorts of things that need to change. That whole visa thing – it’s expensive, difficult, and takes a very long time and a lot of hard work. So, step one may very well never get accomplished.

But I will admit, the idea of moving to a completely, completely new place does sound appealing. This does not mean I hope Trump wins. No, no.

In the meantime, I found some blogs from people who moved from the United States to England:

Maybe I’ll make this “If Trump Wins…” a regular thing; you know, we can relearn how to survive; how to make rope-ladders and wash clothes near the rivers. The media surely won’t be around so I’ll sneak underground and report the news from a blocked IP address.

OK, I’ll stop.

Register to vote, y’all. Right here.

Meanwhile, Beyonce stole my brand:

Have a fantastic weekend! I am hoping to get some gardening in tomorrow, and I’ve got tickets for the Calder Cup playoff game with the Texas Stars…and I’m also going to the Drafthouse to the “Bridesmaids” quote-along! Gonna be a fun one, and I’ll see you right back here on Monday!

Leave a Reply

Please log in using one of these methods to post your comment:

WordPress.com Logo

You are commenting using your WordPress.com account. Log Out /  Change )

Twitter picture

You are commenting using your Twitter account. Log Out /  Change )

Facebook photo

You are commenting using your Facebook account. Log Out /  Change )

Connecting to %s