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‘Southern Charm’: While the Kat’s Away…

‘Southern Charm’ is baaaaaack!

You guys! I have been looking forward to the season 4 premier of “Southern Charm” for at least a month. And last night, it happened. Sorry March Madness, I have more important matters to tend to. Because of my excitement, I’ve decided “Southern Charm” will be my next series to review/recap each week – hope y’all enjoy!

At the kickoff of the episode, T-Rav brings Landon a rose and they go for a walk. He tells her the only thing he needs is a partner and they should just take a shot. WHAT!?!?!

Then it says, “3 Months Earlier”… and we’re cruising through Charleston with Cameron and Sheppy. Cam is headed to Craig’s house, and maybe we’ll see if he’s finally taken the bar exam. He is still dating Naomi, and she’s in school.

He says he did everything this summer to actually finish school and now he’s just waiting for the next exam date.

Back at T-Rav’s, he confirms that Katherine did fail a drug test (after allegations last season), so he has full custody of his children. He also says she hasn’t seen the kids in a “couple months” and she isn’t allowed to see them until she can pass a drug test (WHAT????).

Later, Shep is out with his new friend Austen, who looks just like him. They are talking about how Landon professed her love for Shep last season, and I guess it’s still a “thing”.

In Austen’s introduction, he basically wakes up, sends a chick on her way, admits he’s 29 and ready to mingle after a two-year relationship, and that he “actually” has a job… where he’s a rep for a beer company. But of course!

At Patricia’s, she’s completing a needlepoint of her dog, Chauncy. Whitney comes over for a drink and admits that he recently went to Tallum and smoked weed the entire time. Patricia easily turns the conversation to Katherine, because it has been reported that she’s in rehab for weed, cocaine, and opiates.

Meanwhile, Landon is paddle boarding and claims she’s been scarred with a scarlet letter and she was traveling to escape it (lawd).

At the stables, T-Rav is talking with a friend of Katherine’s (and his) and she says Katherine has been kicked out of where she was living, and had been sending “intoxicated” texts. WHAT? This episode is on fire.

Later, Cam and Shep are shopping, and they are talking about Craig as if he doesn’t have a job… so I’m not sure what happened with his bourbon job with JD? Shep has concluded that everything about Craig is a lie. Yeeeesh.

Craig and Naomi are headed to a party and they get a call from Katherine… which I realize is spelled Kathryn. Apologies.

She says she’s back in Charleston, living with her family. Craig says he’s happy to hear from Kathryn, but his life has been easier without her in it.

Landon is having a pool party, and as soon as Craig and Naomi arrive, he tells her they talked to Kathryn. And Landon is all, “We know the only reason she went to rehab in Malibu is to find a rich boyfriend… her next victim”.

DAMN.

…And then in walks Landon’s boyfriend.. and he’s 25 and pretty cute.

At the party, Shep pulls Naomi aside and asks her what Shep has been doing. He suggests maybe he becomes a chef or a carpenter, which seems to offend her. But he wants to know if Craig will ever really take the bar… but why does he care?

Then, talk of Kathryn seems to take over… and at the same time, Kathryn is loading herself into her Jeep and is headed to the party. Oh. Shit.

….And then of course, she rolls up to the medical center to take another drug test. Good play, Bravo.

That’s the end of the episode, but it shows the season preview, and wow does it look INSANE. And I cannot wait!

‘So Cosmo’: Big New Future.

Cosmopolitan's fitness contributor, Evan Betts.

Cosmopolitan’s fitness contributor, Evan Betts.

Howdy! So… I totally tuned into “So Cosmo” late because I forgot to record it, was not willing to wait until it aired again at midnight, and was clearly REALLY busy eating quinoa to even check my life. So, I missed the first 15 minutes. Apologies.

When I tuned in, Evan is now officially hired and he attends his first staff meeting with Joanna – there is still talk about her leaving, but I’m assuming she didn’t walk out that same day as she had said she would in the previous episode.

Evan invites Diondra to lunch, but she declines even though she knows it would probably be innocent. She is determined to set the boundaries on this relationship (we’ll see about that).

Evan later strikes up a meeting with Danielle, who is the editor of the fitness department. They are going over the workout he is thinking of for the issue, and Diondra sees this through the window and is getting pretty jealous. So naturally, she busts in to see what’s happening. Lord.

Later, Tiffany throws a decent fit over clear hangers. The rack must have clear hangers. Not black ones. Okay?

Meanwhile, the head Beauty Editor, Leah, is really worried about the new editor coming in. She has worked with other magazines before when this has happened, and every time, the editor has cleaned house and brought in an entirely new staff.

So, apparently Joanna did announce who the new editor would be, and the team is seeing her -Michelle – while they are out at fashion week. Awkward!

Leah finally meets with Joanna to talk about her concerns. Joanna basically tells her to just stop worrying about it, do the best she can and stop crying.

But all the while, Fashion Week goes off swimmingly, and things are all pretty good in Cosmo world. In the previews for the next episode, it’s more drama between Evan and Diondra, making me think that THIS is going to be the main storyline for the season. Ugh.

But hey, who’s watching with me next week?!