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‘Southern Charm’: Ain’t No Thang Like a Chicken Wing.

The ‘Southern Charm’ season finale!

Helloooo! I know I’m nearly a WEEK late on my “Southern Charm” recap – I did watch it last Monday night while I was in Indiana, and missed being able to write about it immediately after. But it’s finally here!

You may recall at the end of the previous episode, Landon’s behavior toward Kathryn pretty much shocks the group and that’s where things were left off. The whole scene triggered something in Thomas, and now he’s convinced Landon was just into social climbing, and he’s completely turned off. Relationship = over.

This means that whole beginning scene in the season was a DAMN waste! Argh, Bravo!

On the other hand, there’s Chelsea and Austen. After Austen stood up for Chelsea with the whole Shep shebang, there’s clearly a question in the air about where they stand. Even though Chelsea says she doesn’t want a relationship, they stayed in the same room in Key West, took morning swims together, and seem to be getting along awfully nicelyyyy…

The entire question really comes to a head in one of the final scenes of the season – where Shep has another lady on his lap. Boy is Chelsea FUMING! She confronts him afterward, saying he made her look like a fool, and he’s all, “Well you’re the one who said you didn’t want a relationship.”

So she eats her words and they are officially together. Aw!

Meanwhile, Craig and Naomi are still on the rocks. They have yet another pretty rocky conversation, and it almost looks as if they’re going to break up… but they don’t. However, I am really curious to see where they are at once the reunion airs.

In the end, there were two things that stuck out in this episode: 1. The group spends an entire evening riding around Key West on mopeds, which sounds like no big deal, but it looks hilarious.

Dani faints at a bar and half of the group panics and calls 911, while the other half are out on the town and they speed off to the hospital on their mopeds. It was funny, trust me.

The other thing was that things between Kathryn and Thomas start to get so good… that she tells him she feels the urge to kiss him, so they kiss! By the time the final party rolls around, the entire city knows about it and just CANNOT deal.

Naturally, when the episode ends – we’re left not knowing where they stand. So much reunion fodder!

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‘Mariah’s World’: We Belong Together.

THe last curtain call.

The last curtain call.

I am feeling so refreshed after a nice long-feeling weekend, although I did spend a lot of time on Twitter when I probably shouldn’t have.

But, at last! We’ve reached it to the finale of “Mariah’s World”, a day I never thought would come, as it has been a long, fake journey that we’ve followed Mariah on, and here, 8 hours of edited footage later, we know nothing more than what we did before about her: she’s a diva, has a worthless staff, and she split from James Packer.

So, let’s get to the episode! It’s a few days before the last stop on the tour, and the team is trying to find ways for Tanaka to earn his keep since he’s still on tour, but cannot dance. So, he’s serving as a co-creative director, which I’m sure makes the actual creative director really thrilled.

Mariah takes her kids on safari, in full on stripper heels because she doesn’t “own flats”.

Before the last show, Mariah starts thinking about what she’s going to do next – she says she wants to spend more time with her children and get back into the studio to create. The last show goes flawlessly, and at the end of it, the staff is pretty emotional.

Tanaka mentions something to Anthony (the creative director) about “co-creating” with him, and Anthony sort of rolls his eyes and looks the other way. When Tanaka asks Stella about it, Stella confirms that they haven’t told Anthony about it. Oh, awesome.

Later, Stella shows up at Mariah’s house, saying there are three options for dates for the wedding, but Mariah isn’t available on any of them. It is my understanding that these dates are coming from the prenuptial agreement? I have no idea how any of that works, but it creates this awkward scene where Mariah and Stella are just sort of staring at each other and there’s no mention of James, or calling him, and Stella is all, “Well the universe has plot twists”…

Like I hope I haven’t watched this damn show for two months to be told the break up was caused by THE UNIVERSE.

A few days later, Mariah heads into the studio to do some writing and recording. And then the team heads to Mishka’s birthday party. She’s Stella’s daughter, who is 12, and serves as Mariah’s social media manager. I cannot and will not get over this.

Please note, the party is very similar to any of the ones you saw years ago on MTV’s “My Sweet Sixteen”.

Mariah and Tanaka head out for a walk and end up in this little gazebo thing, and they’re practicing a dance life (uh, isn’t he still injured, or is this a scene they shot later and filled in?). They are sort of slow dancing, and he’s telling her she looks beautiful… and then he’s like, “Are you really going to marry this guy?”

He tells her he just wants her to be happy, and she says some sort of weird rambling thing about how she doesn’t really know what that means, and maybe happiness is different for everyone.

Later, there’s a team meeting where Anthony finds out he’s got a co-creator. And, he’s pissed. But he’s a professional and agrees, the show must go on.

Mariah has a later performance (they don’t say how much later) in Hawaii, and she spends a little time in the studio beforehand. She sings a song she’s just written and it’s about not getting the love you deserve. Stella overhears the song and also notices Mariah left her engagement ring in the booth… mmhmm.

They have a short talk about how Mariah just “can’t do this”, but they don’t reveal any details.

The show in Hawaii goes perfectly, and Tanaka is back on the stage, recovered from his injury.

At the end of the episode, Mariah is on the beach at sunset, and here comes Tanaka, all tan and shirtless, and they kiss on the beach… it can’t be real.

And that’s the end!

I don’t know how much you, the readers, enjoy these TV recaps, but I have hopes of being a TV show reviewer someday, so I’ve got to keep practicing. The next show I’ll be recapping is also on E! (swear they’re not paying me), called “So Cosmo”.

This reality show followers ACTUAL staff members at “Cosmopolitan” magazine, including the Editor-in-Chief, and shows us what it’s like to work there. E! has been showing a “Meet the Cast” extended preview of the show for a few weeks, and it looks pretty entertaining, to say the least. Here’s the official trailer:

Uhh, talk about THIS IS THE BEST IDEA FOR A TELEVISION SHOW, EVER. I would d-i-e to work at “Cosmopolitan”, and this is probably the closest chance I’ll get. “So Cosmo” premiers next Wednesday on E! at 7pm CST.

‘Insecure’: Broken as F**k.

The season finale of 'Insecure'!

The season finale of ‘Insecure’!

Monday is baaaack! Omigosh, I hope you all really had a fun and delicious holiday weekend. I was so excited for Thursday to come, and I got up early, watched the parade, made a pie, and drank my weight in champagne-based cocktails. And then by the time Friday was here, I was feeling all sorts of pressure to make the weekend productive, and fun, and relaxing all at once, and I nearly had an anxiety attack. Does this happen to anyone else, or just me?

Anyway, it ended up being a great weekend – and it was fun, productive, and relaxing. Mission accomplished. Although the idea of a five-day work week is a little intimidating after a four-day weekend, I know it’s possible, and sorry not sorry, but I’m just gonna go ‘head and start that countdown until “Christmas Break”, okay?

But in the meantime, we’ve got Sunday night TV to hold us over. And last night, it was the bittersweet season finale of HBO’s “Insecure”. After last week’s episode, I was REALLY curious to see how the writers were going to wrap this one up, while keeping some sort of suspense for season two.

So, let’s get into it!

At the start of the episode, we find Issa doing what (I think) we all do post-breakup. Moping, on the couch, surfing Facebook, and embarrassing ourselves calling the ex too many times. After a few days, she stops by his new office and he gets pissed, and tells her not to call him anymore because he is DONE.

So, Issa heads to Malibu with her girlfriends for Kelly’s birthday. Molly is obviously still mad and is pretty cold for the majority of the trip despite Issa’s efforts to make her laugh and, at the very least, break the ice.

Molly is still hurt from what Issa said about her habits with men, and plays right into it when they’re all out dancing, and she’s making out with a random guy on the dancefloor, and ends up sleeping with him that night.

At this point, we’re 26 minutes into a 30-minute show and it’s looking like there’s no way Issa is going to have a happy ending. But at about that moment, one of the girls calls Issa out and tells her to stop acting like she has a boyfriend when she doesn’t, and know the group knows that they brokeup.

Just then, Lawrence calls Issa from the strip club where he nearly paid to sleep with a stripper. But instead, he calls Issa and tells her he misses her, and maybe they should talk. He throws in the thought that he hates sleeping at Chad’s.

Issa tells him she will be gone until Monday, so if he needs a place to stay he can go to the apartment. He says okay, and they hang up.

Issa immediately tells the ladies she has to go home because Lawrence wants to talk. None of them agree to go or to take her, but Molly comes through with the keys, and the two are heading home. Molly admits to Issa that she’s right, she is a mess, and Issa admits she’s got some work to do, too.

Issa gets home, and see’s Lawrence’s keys on the counter, but as she’s walking through the apartment, he doesn’t appear to be home. This is where it got a little fuzzy for me… it shows his Best Buy shirt hanging on the door, but perhaps he came and got his other belongings from the apartment before she got there?

Because the next scene, he’s at Tasha’s (the bank teller) apartment having wild sex with her. Like no holds.

And bam, Issa and Molly are outside on the bouch with a bottle of wine.

ROUGH.

As tough as this scene was to watch, it’s the realest ending they could have crafted. I almost thought Issa was going to end up with Molly and Lawrence back and it would have seemed too good to be true.

So, now we have to wait until season two. And I have a feeling it’s going to be a loooong wait, because that was such a good show!

Whew! So, even though “Insecure” is over for now, I hope you weren’t thinking that Sunday night TV recaps were coming to a close. Leave it to me to find something else to recap and feature it right here, on Mondays. What will we be recapping next? But of course, “Mariah’s World” on E!, which premiers Sunday, December 4 (perfect timing) at 9pm EST.

I have SO many questions about how this “8-Part Event” is going to play out, including all of the parts that focus on her now-ex. Will they be edited out or kept in; I find it hard to believe Mariah would let them stay. But only time will tell, and I cannot wait to see. Next Sunday!

Podcasts I’ve been listening to, Part IV.

Happy Friday! It should come as no shock that I’m still deep in podcast land; listening to as many episodes as possible to make it through my days in a cubicle. Thanks to other podcast listeners, and just general digging, I’ve managed to find some new (new to me) shows to keep me occupied when my usual podcasts haven’t posted a new episode yet.

Risk! I heard about the Risk! podcast from listening to another podcast (so meta), and I was pleasantly surprised once I started listening. Here is the “About Us” section from the Risk! website:

RISK! is a live show and podcast “where people tell true stories they never thought they’d dare to share in public” hosted by Kevin Allison, of the legendary TV sketch comedy troupe The State. The award-winning live show happens monthly in New York and Los Angeles. It’s featured people like Janeane Garofalo, Lisa Lampanelli, Kevin Nealon, Margaret Cho, Marc Maron, Sarah Silverman, Lili Taylor, Rachel Dratch, Andy Borowitz and more, dropping the act and showing a side of themselves we’ve never seen before. The weekly podcast gets around a million downloads each month. Slate.com called it “jaw-dropping, hysterically funny, and just plain touching.”

Dear Sugar. I believe I heard about Dear Sugar from another podcast, also. Most podcasts feature ads for other podcasts and I think this was one of those situations. I’ve just started listening to this one this week, so I’m only a few episodes in, but so far, I’m getting a more doctor-scientific-ish version of “Dear Abby” – type of vibe. Here’s the website description for the podcast:

The universe has good news for the lost, lonely and heartsick. Dear Sugar is here, and speaking straight into your ears. Hosted by the original Sugars, Cheryl Strayed and Steve Almond, the podcast fields all your questions — no matter how deep or dark — and offers radical empathy in return. New episodes are released weekly.

The Moth. I heard about The Moth on the season 5 finale of “Girls”, when Hannah goes to a live storytelling event, ready to spill the beans about Adam and Jessa:

I didn’t realize it was a podcast, too, until I saw it on the top podcast charts. Here is the brief description from The Moth website

The Moth Podcast features re-airs of all new episodes of The Moth Radio Hour, plus additional stories from our vast archive recorded over the past two decades. Episodes are released every Tuesday.

The stories are a mixed bag; they are all true, but some are hilarious and some are really sad. I listened to a few stories from middle school students during a “takeover” week. If you’re into stories, this is a goodie.

2 Dope Queens. A coworker recommended this one to me and I will be forever grateful, because it is so hilarious, I listed to all 13 episodes within two days. I am anxiously awaiting new ones! A little bit about the show, according to the website:

Phoebe Robinson and Jessica Williams are funny. They’re black. They’re BFFs. And they host a live comedy show in Brooklyn. Join the 2 Dope Queens, along with their favorite comedians, for stories about sex, romance, race, hair journeys, living in New York, and Billy Joel. Plus a whole bunch of other s**t.

What podcasts are you guys listening to? I’m always looking for new ones and I’d love to hear your ideas! Have a fantastic weekend, and stay safe…and dry! See you here, on Monday 🙂