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‘So Cosmo’: Woman Up.

Diandra at “Fun Fearless Money”.

Hey, hey! It has been a bit of a doozy of a week – so bad I almost had to go out and buy myself a bottle of wine, but I didn’t, because 1. I’m too lazy, and 2. I’m really serious about not messing up my “sleep study” (please read Tuesday’s post for clarity). Either way, I’m happy we’re on the downside of the week, and coasting right on into the weekend.

Which means one thing: A new episode of “So Cosmo” was on last night! The episode starts with Diandra and Evan on a D-A-T-E – she gets a helicopter to take them over the city. Seriously? THIS is the type of shit I need to be doing? Where have all the cowboys gone?

It was super romantic until Evan was all, “Is there a Mile High Club for helicopters?”

Meanwhile, Tiffany has a girlfriend over for a little champagne and she just casually has the “Cosmo Karma Sutra” book on her coffee table, because it’s “pretty”. So the ladies are flipping through the book and they get to talking about guys they’ve dated and it comes up that Tiffany actually went through a recent breakup with a guy she thought was “the one”.

In work news, Adam got a great opportunity to shoot the “Tips and Sips” shoot – remember, it’s the spread about manicures inspired by cocktails? Basically he is flipping the fuck out over it, and trying to get help from other coworkers and they are having none of it.

Later, there’s a Facebook Live event where Evan has his shirt off and is holding a puppy (I mean, dear God). The readers are allowed to ask questions and of course, they want to know if he is single. He says Diandra wants to keep things secret, so yeah, he’s single! And heeereeee we gooooo.

The day of the “Tips and Sips” shoot, and Adam is really nervous to show his skillz in front of Leah. And right off the bat, the first look he chose is just too much (think: red sequined jumpsuit with Sangria-inspired nails).

But as the shoot continues, his style picks are right on-point. Leah tells him he did a great job, and he’s really, really relieved. Yay!!

At Diandra’s apartment, her friend is over, and she also invites Evan over, and her girlfriend is like freaking OOOUT over how how Evan is. He does seem flattered that Diandra has at least told one of her friends about them.

At a work event, Diandra gets a text from Evan – a pic of him with his shirt off and damn it looks FWINE – and Tiffany happens to be looking over her shoulder and sees the picture. Naturally, she freaks out and starts asking a ton of questions about what happened in Miami. Diandra plays coy and is now afraid she’s going to be labeled as “The office slore”. Well, yeah. Probably so.

Another night at the office, I’m not sure how, but Diandra and Tiffany are having glasses of wine at their desks, and Tiffany tells Diandra this story about how she ran into her ex- the ex – the night before. I guess he left Tiffany and got married right away, then divorced soon after and already had another girlfriend – who he was with when he ran into Tiffany. Yikes.

Later, a second coworker tells Diandra that she knows about Evan and Diandra needs to “watch out” if she’s thinking of dating someone at work. Diandra says she loves her job, but she also doesn’t want to sacrifice a relationship, but she stands Evan up for their next date, and man does he look sad. Like, real sad.

She eventually tells him they need to cool it because she can’t handle people at work talking about it. And he is sad! Like it seems really sad – I didn’t even know guys cared, at all. So… this has kind of got me hooked because obviously the episode was over after that. Next week, y’all! It goes down!

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‘So Cosmo’: BAHAMADRAMA.

Another installment of ‘So Cosmo’.

Austin is hopping from SXSW, and I partook in a little bit of the fun yesterday (read: I broke my diet to drink a frose – frozen rose – and eat a Frito pie)! I also stopped by an iconic Austin spot, Jo’s Coffee, and had their signature drink, an “Iced Turbo” and it was fantastic. But, today I’m reminded of my age, as my back and legs hurt tremendously. But, it was worth it.

So, last night on “So Cosmo”… now the relationship is on like Donkey Kong between Diandra and Evan. Oh la la! Diandra is working on an article for “Cosmo” about how she posed nude for the first time. Note: when she posed was when she was in the Hamptons – and she’s not nude, it’s implied (bubbles are covering her bits).

Regardless, she shows Evan the picture, and in return, he rips his shirt off right in the office (WHY do I not work at Cosmo?!).

In other news, there is a scheduled photo shoot for the magazine in the Bahamas, and a massive hurricane is coming. The backup plan is Miami, even though that doesn’t really look promising, either. So, now the team has to come up with a third plan, which is Coney Island.

However, Diandra and Evan are already in Miami… so that’s interesting. But even when the boss calls them to hop on a plane ASAP, the chances are pretty high that they’ll stay another night.

They hit the night scene, and it’s pretty cute, not gonna lie. They do have separate rooms, but it appears they only used one…

The only other question about the shoot is… who is going to do it? Because the best fitness shoots involve a fitness model, and Diandra was supposed to do it, but can she? Can she hold a squat in the proper position? Guess we’ll have to see.

Part of the shoot is on the beach, meaning Evan and Diandra are literally doing single-handed planks in the sand. Ouch.

The other part of the shoot is a fashion spread on the boardwalk, and it looks cute with all of the retro rides and bright colors.

Back at the office, some of the editors take a look at all of the pictures. They are feeling the pressure because this is the first photo shoot they’ll be showing their new editor. Steven takes a hard look at the pictures of Evan and Diandra, and it turns out they look really great.

James jokes that they’ll probably be putting D on the cover next year… but who knows!

The preview for next week’s episode looks like more drama between Evan and Diandra, and I think this whole thing is getting tired. Le sigh. Come on, Cosmo!

‘So Cosmo’: Big New Future.

Cosmopolitan's fitness contributor, Evan Betts.

Cosmopolitan’s fitness contributor, Evan Betts.

Howdy! So… I totally tuned into “So Cosmo” late because I forgot to record it, was not willing to wait until it aired again at midnight, and was clearly REALLY busy eating quinoa to even check my life. So, I missed the first 15 minutes. Apologies.

When I tuned in, Evan is now officially hired and he attends his first staff meeting with Joanna – there is still talk about her leaving, but I’m assuming she didn’t walk out that same day as she had said she would in the previous episode.

Evan invites Diondra to lunch, but she declines even though she knows it would probably be innocent. She is determined to set the boundaries on this relationship (we’ll see about that).

Evan later strikes up a meeting with Danielle, who is the editor of the fitness department. They are going over the workout he is thinking of for the issue, and Diondra sees this through the window and is getting pretty jealous. So naturally, she busts in to see what’s happening. Lord.

Later, Tiffany throws a decent fit over clear hangers. The rack must have clear hangers. Not black ones. Okay?

Meanwhile, the head Beauty Editor, Leah, is really worried about the new editor coming in. She has worked with other magazines before when this has happened, and every time, the editor has cleaned house and brought in an entirely new staff.

So, apparently Joanna did announce who the new editor would be, and the team is seeing her -Michelle – while they are out at fashion week. Awkward!

Leah finally meets with Joanna to talk about her concerns. Joanna basically tells her to just stop worrying about it, do the best she can and stop crying.

But all the while, Fashion Week goes off swimmingly, and things are all pretty good in Cosmo world. In the previews for the next episode, it’s more drama between Evan and Diondra, making me think that THIS is going to be the main storyline for the season. Ugh.

But hey, who’s watching with me next week?!

The drink: Pom-cosmo.

Kona Grill's Pomegranate Cosmopolitan... Yum!

Kona Grill’s Pomegranate Cosmopolitan… Yum!

The classic Cosmopolitan — a tart elixir focusing on cranberry — will never go out of style. But leave it to Kona Grill to give this cocktail more than just a lime twist.

Kona Grill offers the Cosmopolitan in watermelon, grape, and pomegranate flavors. I opted for the pomegranate (don’t worry, watermelon, I’ll be back) and I was pleasantly surprised.

Made with vodka, cranberry juice, triple sec, a squeeze of lime, and pomegranate syrup, this cocktail is light on the tongue and dangerously easy to swallow.

The extra perk? During happy hour, it’s only $5, which means you can try all the flavors for under $20.

There’s a twist you can’t refuse — bottoms up!

Grab a seat in the bar or on the patio for Kona Grill’s happy hour, Mon-Fri 3pm-7pm, Mon-Thur 9pm-11pm, Fri & Sat 10p-12am, Sat 1pm-5pm, and all day Sunday.

Not About Termites.

Late last year, I entered a blogging contest for Cosmopolitan.com. The prompt was about the most important relationship you had in college, and what you learned from it. I hated to give a guy that title, yet I probably would have won the contest if I had, because, you know…Cosmo. Either way, now it’s here for the world to see. 

I found this by Googling, "Happy Roommates."

I found this by Googling, “Happy Roommates.”

She answered the dorm door wearing plaid boxers, a men’s t-shirt, and an Obagi facial mask.

“Hey,” I said. “I’m your new roommate!”

My entire life was packed in bags and piled behind me in the hall. She opened the door a little wider.

It was the start of my second semester, freshman year. I’d moved 15 hours south of my hometown to a place I knew no one. My first roommate and I were too different, so I moved out. Now, I was moving in with a girl who was used to living solo.

It was awkward and quiet as I unpacked my things, until she caught a glimpse of my extensive DVD collection.

“You like Sex and The City?” she asked.

“Oh yeah, I’ve got all the seasons,” I said.

Her eyes widened, and in attempts to offer an olive branch, I told her she could watch them whenever she wanted.

I came to know my new roomie, Michelle, over the next week, and things were going as well as they could. That is, until I came home late after a night of studying to find a hand-written note from Michelle taped to our door:

“I took a nap this afternoon and woke up covered in termites. I am staying with a friend. They sprayed the room, but you should probably stay somewhere, too.”

As I opened the door, I could smell the stale bug spray. Dead termites covered the coral rug I’d placed a week before. The bug-eaten wall beside Michelle’s bed looked as if it’d been hit with a sledgehammer.

I crashed with a friend in another dorm that night, and met Michelle and residential life the next day. I asked Michelle what happened.

“I was asleep, but I kept feeling something on me,” she said. “I woke up and just saw them on me and flying around.”

I shuddered. Ew.

Residential life had trouble finding an open room for us; even sending us into a few rooms that were already occupied. It was getting late and Michelle and I had nowhere to stay. So I did what most college students do in a time of need—I called my dad.

He, of course, was mad that Michelle and I had paid for dorms and were essentially homeless. He told us to go to the nearest hotel and he would take care of it.

Michelle didn’t have a car, so both of our belongings were stuffed into the backseat of my tiny Daewoo. We hopped in the front and I drove off-campus to a Hampton Inn. When we walked in the lobby, it was obvious we’d made a name for ourselves.

“You didn’t bring any termites with you, right?” asked the guy at the front desk.

We shook our heads, got our room keys, and headed upstairs. Compared to our dorm room, the hotel felt luxurious.

As we got ready for bed, we just had to laugh at the situation. After just knowing each other for a week, we’d had something crazy happen to us, and we were now living in a hotel together.

By the weekend, the university had found us a dorm room in an entirely different building. Just as new roommates do, we claimed our sides of the room and unpacked our things, hoping the past wasn’t a sign of our future.

Part of me felt guilty. While I didn’t trigger the termites, I felt like I barged in on Michelle’s peaceful life, settled in her dorm room alone, relaxing in her clay facial mask.

But Michelle didn’t see it that way at all.

Michelle became more than my roommate, she was my friend. During the remainder of the semester, we watched plenty of Sex and The City, went out for sushi dinners, and even made martinis in our dorm (which resulted in Michelle puking in the communal bathroom sink).

Late one night, Michelle told me about her family. She said they weren’t fully supportive of her studying English and theatre. They wanted her to study something more “serious.”

In that moment, we grew even closer. Without realizing it, Michelle made me appreciate my situation, my parents, and their support.

When the semester came to a close, I was sad to say goodbye to Michelle. Although we got new roommates, we still met up for movies or sushi on occasion.

I have only seen Michelle a few times since I graduated six years ago, but we still keep in touch. Looking back, Michelle was one of the best roommates I had, but she was also a great friend.

It’s a friendship that proves first impressions aren’t everything, and that bad situations can evolve into something really, really good.