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BBC: ‘My Year With Eleanor’.

Hellooooo! I know it’s technically a holiday, so perhaps you’re reading this from the comfort of your bed? Or the beach? Here’s to hoping!

I’m at the office today, but we have spent a majority of the week packing, since the movers are coming tomorrow to put all of our work things in a new building. I checked out the place yesterday, and it’s nice, but very corporate. I’ll report there on Monday, so we’ll see how that goes.

I am really excited to talk about the last book I read: “My Year With Eleanor” by Noelle Hancock.

This book has been on my reading list for quite awhile, and I went to several bookstores looking for it. My mom eventually ordered it from a far away Half-Price Books, and I’ve just been waiting for the exact right time to read it. I knew it was going to be inspiring, and well, I’m in need of some inspiration! Here’s the scoop from Amazon.com:

In the tradition of My Year of Living Biblically and Eat Pray Love comes My Year with Eleanor, Noelle Hancock’s hilarious tale of her decision to heed the advice of First Lady Eleanor Roosevelt and do one thing a day that scares her in the year before her 30th birthday. Fans of Sloane Crosley and Chelsea Handler will absolutely adore Hancock’s charming and outrageous chronicle of her courageous endeavor and delight in her poignant and inspiring personal growth.

While I’m not a huge fan of the loads of Eleanor Roosevelt quotes out there, I can definitely appreciate a person willing to step out on a ledge for an entire year.

When you think about it, doing something every day that scares you seems like a really terrible task – despite all the growth, of course. But, Noelle Hancock mixes it up and does some really terrifying things (gets in a shark cage, flies a fighter jet, and goes skydiving), and she does some things that are less scary, but leave room for embarrassment (sings karaoke, does stand up comedy, and visits her ex boyfriends).

Naturally, she saves one giant task for last, and I won’t spoil it.

I know there’s lots of books out there like this, and while I haven’t read “Eat, Pray, Love”, I’ve heard it’s pretentious, and that’s exactly what I loved about Noelle’s story. It was honest, and although she shared all of the cool things she learned from her journey, she was also willing to show the dark side – think: sleeping pills, snotsicles, and an empty checking account.

I’m definitely, 100% recommending this book to anyone who feels like they’re in a rut, or perhaps feel like they haven’t lived their full potential yet. Who knows, maybe this book will inspire your “Year of Fear”!

The next book Blanche’s Book Club will be reading is… drumroll… “13 Reasons Why” by Jay Asher. Read along with us by simply commenting here on the blog, or following me on social media @OrangeJulius7.

And so, it’s Easter weekend! I am not religious, but I treated myself to a Marshmallow Milky Way (YAS), and I’m pretty sure I’m going to make this Sunday a Funday, complete with eggs and mimosas… because, Easter.

Have a fun on, y’all!

Yes: ‘Dance Squad’ & Mayer Snaps.

The LA Clippers dance team has their own show on E!

The LA Clippers dance team has their own show on E!

Is it just me or is Tuesday night TV pretty much as good as it gets? Probably just me, given that I’m a complete TV junkie.

While I’m still pretty wrapped up in “The People vs. O.J. Simpson”, and admittedly, “The Voice”, last Tuesday E! premiered “LA Clippers Dance Squad”, as in a completely behind-the-scenes look at what it’s like to be a member of a professional dance team.

Hells-to-the-yes.

I have pretty much always dreamed of being on a dance team in some form or fashion, so watching this is the best of both worlds: I get to live vicariously through the young, hardworking dancers, and I can do it from the comfort of my bed. What more could a girl ask for?

The first episode was a good introduction to a few of the team members as they went through auditions, and you also get a good look at the Clippers Spirit’s new Creative Director, Petra Pope, and she means BUSINESS.

From TVseriesfinale.com: “Petra has an extensive resume in pro basketball, having led dance teams of the NBA’s Los Angeles Lakers, New York Knicks and Brooklyn Nets in the past. She’s now moved back to Los Angeles to revamp the Clippers’ dance squad and take it to the next level.”

As far as team members, there are 20 girls to start, and it seems like some of them may get clipped (ha, punny) as the season continues. My favorite girl is most definitely Hannah, as she’s from Louisiana and left everything behind (including a long-term boyfriend) to pursue her dreams in Los Angeles. Go girl!

I also like Savannah – she’s that Tennessee cool girl I aspire to be in my next life. Some of the show is simply footage from practice (which I enjoy because I love dance practice), but other parts of the show are beautiful shots of L.A. (d-i-e), and of course, adventures and drama these girls get into. Three of them are roommates, so that should be interesting.

On tonight’s episode, it looks like Petra makes a *SHOCKING* decision for co-captain and everyone is pissed! Eeeek! The show airs Tuesday nights on E! at 10 p.m. EST.

So, I know I’ve talked about John Mayer being on SnapChat before, and just to give you an update, he still hasn’t approved ANY of my Snaps yet, but I’m going to persevere!

Regardless, I have still been watching his snap story… and let’s just say that his cute little snaps are only making me like him more.

Hiiii...

Hiiii…

About 75% of the snaps are of course, him playing music or spending time backstage as he is currently on tour with Dead & Company.

But the other 25% of his snaps are absolute nonsense and brain-dumping; i.e. what we know John Mayer to do best, aside from untouched guitar talent.

He talks a lot about making social media personal again, using snapchat for selfies, and his theories on adults owning Pedialyte.

But perhaps my favorite snaps are of him, hand washing his white t-shirts in his marble sink (which has gold hardware, mind you).

Why do I love this so much? Probably because it shows his domesticated side, and his dedication to white shirts. He could very well pay someone to hand wash his seven white shirts, but no, he does it himself, and even hangs each one on a drying rack.

What is my weakness? White shirts and denim. D E A R G O D.

I would actually pay him to hand wash his white shirts. And I would also sit and watch them dry for four hours, just to make sure nothing happened to them. And then I would die happy.

#LifeGoals

Dirty 30: the aching back.

Lower back pain is a lil bitch.

Lower back pain is a lil bitch.

Here we are, at the start of another week. And, I’m excited to say that I’m starting a new series here on the blog: “Dirty 30.” Dirty 30 is going to focus on all of the shitty things that happen once you turn 30. What a joy, right?

The first Dirty 30 installment is on back pain. Because my back hurts like every day. About six months before I turned 30, a friend told me that as SOON as he woke up on his 30th birthday, his whole body was in pain — like, he wished for a wheelchair.

Truthfully, I’ve had back pain, and other body pains, for years. Whether it be from the gym, sleeping weird, or simply stress, it’s no real shocker when I wake up and reach for the pain meds.

But many of my friends have said that back pain has kicked in as of late. So, what gives?

According to the National Institute of Arthritis and Musculoskeletal and Skin Diseases, back pain is more common the older you get, particularly at age 30 and 40. Back pain is also most common in those who are less fit and/or unhealthy. It can also be a part of heredity.

You can avoid back pain by staying fit, and avoiding heavy lifting.

Hmm. That seems like a crock of shit. So, back pain doesn’t just happen? Because I feel like I wakeup on multiple mornings not understanding why I’m hobbling around in so much pain.

Nevertheless, how are we supposed to get relief?

There’s the obvious pain killers, hot and cold packs, yoga, gentle exercise, and sitting in a hot tub. Quick! Where are all my friends with hot tubs?

I suppose my new hobby of hip hop dance isn’t the best solution for my back troubles, but that’s just going to be something I deal with later.

If you’ve got remedies for back pain that isn’t listed, leave it in the comments! And, if you’ve got topic ideas for “Dirty 30,” I’d love to hear them: shoot me a message at: holly@thebitterlemon.com

Meanwhile, I caught up on “Scream Queens” yesterday… what the hell is that show? Seems like Gossip Girl plus Jawbreaker plus Legally Blonde. I dunno…

Birthday Perspective.

Cheers, it's ya birthday.

Cheers, it’s ya birthday.

I turned 30 last week.

I’ve never been big on celebrating my birthday. I don’t know if it’s because I’m a little shy at times, or because having a birthday so close to July 4th made parties as a kid nearly impossible (everyone was always out-of-town).

I never thought age would bother me — it’s just a number. But since my 25th birthday, each year the number has bothered me more and more.

I thought I’d be married with kids by now. Is single “okay” at 30?

For my 26th birthday, I flew to Chicago to meet up with my best friend.

I was in an on-off relationship with a guy that, looking back on it, really treated me poorly. Now, he’s married to one of the women he cheated on me with.

During my layover in Houston, I got drunk and missed my connecting flight as I was chatting with a cute guy.

He was on the same flight heading to Chicago, and when we tried to get on a new one, the airline told us we were stuck until the next morning.

So, I did exactly what you’re not supposed to do in this situation and hopped in a cab with a perfect stranger.

We went to a bar, played darts, and took birthday shots. My flight was at 6 am the next morning.

He offered his place for me to sleep, and said he’d take me to the airport.

I had no luggage, so he let me borrow his phone charger, a shirt to sleep in, and we ended up hooking up.

While I would never recommend anyone doing that, I was starting to wonder if my now-30 self would ever be that spontaneous and daring.

I was certain I would not — I find myself getting less excited over potential boyfriends, and I do a lot of telling myself that it’s going to be okay even if I never get married.

But, then my 30th birthday happened.

My friend stuck with tradition and offered to take me to dinner. We went to City Pork Brasserie & Bar, where we had wine and a Grand Board (the salmon pate is delicious).

We closed down the place, bought the kitchen a six-pack, and were ready to hit the town.

Next, we went to Pelican House where we met a slew of pretty cute guys, and drank too many beers.

And somehow, we ended up at The Penthouse Club around 1am with said guys.

Naturally, my friend got a stack of dollars and we proceeded to give the Penthouse ladies some love.

Being that it was my birthday, I got a lap dance and ended up in a private room with Lauren, from New Orleans.

She got most of my dollars.

Just when I thought turning 30 meant giving up my fun card, I had a night like that.

Sure, I felt like absolute crap the next day, but it was completely worth it.

Age is all about what you make it.

At 30, I’m starting to see the world really is my oyster. I’ve got options — sometimes too many — and I can basically do whatever I want… Even if it means lounging at The Penthouse Club on a Thursday night.