Blog Archives

Pic of the Week… & Another Giveaway!

June Tattly pack!

June Tattly pack!

Last week, I got my monthly subscription from Tattly in the mail, and I realized that although I am always posting pictures of my Tattlys on Twitter, I have never really mentioned them on my blog.

…Which is completely foolish, because getting a pack of Tattlys in the mail makes my day (and sometimes my whole week)!

So, what’s Tattly? Here’s what their website says:

Tired of putting poorly designed temporary tattoos on her daughter’s arm, Tina Roth Eisenberg took matters into her own hands. After soliciting a dozen world renowned artists and designers, hiring the first two team members, and learning what a temporary tattoo was actually made of, Tattly began moving at full force.
In July of 2011, Tattly launched online, featuring an all-star lineup of professional designers and illustrators. Starting with just a handful of designs, Tattly received thousands of orders from around the world.

So there you have it, Tattly is a company that makes temporary tattoos that look cool, and they’re fun. Plus, I like wearing the ones that say “Fuck Haters” under my long sleeves at work.

Made for me...

Made for me…

It’s my own, personal way of sticking it to the man.

And so, since I love Tattly so much, I wanted to share! Because of that, I’m giving away a $5.00 gift card to Tattly (which will get you a pack of two tattoos of your choice) — although may I recommend the Tangy Lemon Tattly?

Had to.

So, leave a comment by Wednesday night at 9 pm Central, tell me WHAT Tattly you’re going to get, and I’ll select a random commenter using Random.org. I will post the winner’s name and number on THURSDAY’S blog post, so be there!

Happy commenting!

WYSK: Amy Winehouse.

Beautiful & talented, Amy Winehouse

Beautiful & talented, Amy Winehouse

When I heard the song, “Rehab” for the first time, I thought Amy Winehouse was a smart-mouthed, bad ass bitch, just making fun of pop culture and it’s celebulites, of the Lindsay Lohan-sort.

So, I bought “Back to Black,” unaware that it would be an album that changed my world — not unlike Lauryn Hill’s “The Miseducation of Lauryn Hill.” Having just gone through a breakup at the time, her words struck a chord in my heart. Hell, most of the songs still ring true for me today, and I have a feeling they will for awhile.

I don’t understand, Why do I stress A man, When there’s so many bigger things at hand, We could a never had it all, We had to hit a wall, So this is inevitable withdrawal, Even if I stop wanting you, A Perspective pushes true, I’ll be some next man’s other woman soon.

—Amy Winehouse, Tears Dry On Their Own

I was obsessed with the lyrics on the entire album, the jazz sound, not to mention her cool style — the hair, the eyes — and of course, her signature voice. But I wasn’t the only one who loved what I was hearing: the album won a Grammy for Best Pop Vocal Album (for 2007), it was named UK’s 2nd Bestselling Album of the 21st Century (selling 3.5 copies in the UK alone), and by 2012, it had sold more than 20 million copies around the world.

main

Amy’s 2007 RS cover

Shortly after I fell in love with the album, I was so excited to get my hands on a copy of Amy’s cover issue of Rolling Stone. But when I read the story inside, I discovered something I never expected — her substance problems.

I know, I know, call me crazy. But I was naive, and I didn’t really know anything about drugs or terms, and I didn’t know that her songs were referring to actual experience with substance abuse.

“I loved you much, it’s not enough, you love blow, and I love puff…” (Back to Black).

I called my mom in tears — why was such a talented person doing drugs? I was scared she would die before I ever got to see her perform live.

It was a moment I’ll never forget — a loss of innocence from a magazine, happening when I was nearly 22 years old.

I put it in that part of my mind that does myself favors; eventually letting my worries fade. After all, I’ve never let an artist’s personal life deter me from making a decision about their craft. There’s something attractive to me about people who are so, so passionate about what they do, it nearly becomes their demise.

What I love about Ms. Winehouse was her honesty. She sang about her relationships openly, even if they weren’t stereotypically beautiful. Her songs were relatable, and that is priceless.

I continued as a fan, bought her previous album, “Frank,” watched her live performances on YouTube, and turned a cheek when paparazzi took jabs wherever they could, releasing less-than-flattering photos of my favorite cat-eyed chick.

And then, we all know what happened. Her time was cut short. I was in the worst mood when I found out she was gone; I felt silly for being so upset about a celebrity dying, but I was so sad that she was so young, and that we’d never get to hear new material.

But I know my sorrow was selfish.

And as sad as I was, and sometimes still get over our lost legend, I was thrilled when an album was released, “Lioness: Hidden Treasure,” songs by Amy Winehouse that were left unheard, or remixes of songs fans loved — my favorite song on that album is a cover of “Our Day Will Come” (click the picture below to see the video and hear Amy’s version).

Today, Amy Winehouse is remembered by her family, friends, and fans. Donate to the Amy Winehouse Foundation, or buy cool merchandise that supports their efforts to help young talents with substance abuse problems.

The one and only...

The one and only…

Life’s short. Anything could happen, and it usually does, so there is no point in sitting around thinking about all the ifs, ands and buts.

—Amy Winehouse, 1983-2011

Summer Lovin’.

'Cause a little bit of summer's what the whole year's all about...

‘Cause a little bit of summer’s what the whole year’s all about…

Tomorrow marks the official start of summer, even though Baton Rouge has already been sitting in the 90-degree heat for awhile. When I lived in Indiana, I loved summer. Of course, I was in school, so that meant summers off from class, working shifts at the custard shop,  cool night drives on winding country roads, and if I was lucky, a summer crush.

Since I work now, all year, summer isn’t quite the same. And I’m not sure this southern heat is made for bodies getting close. However, there’s still a few things I love about the summer months, so here they are…

Pooltime

Calorie-free sprinkled donut!

Calorie-free sprinkled donut!

With this heat, a pool is not even a luxury, it is a must-have. I am lucky enough to have access to pools, and often, this relaxation time includes refreshing cocktails, friends, and many hours on a raft — like the donut raft on the left (a great investment).

A day at the pool also means an entire day wearing no pants, and instead wearing a swimsuit. I know that, especially for women, swimsuit season can be stressful.

But when I’m at the pool with my best friends, I know they’re not going to judge me, no matter how I look, so I always try to find cute, fun swimsuits. I am loving the ruffled bandeau tops that are in style this season!

Coconut… Everything

Ahh, the smell of coconut makes me think of the beach, and the beach makes me happy. So when summer comes ’round and I’ve got an excuse to wear/use coconut body products, I am all over that! Here are some of my favorites:

  • Moroccainoil Moisture Repair shampoo & conditioner — Has a slight coconut scent and is gentle enough to use on color-treated hair (I’m a natural blonde, you know, so I’ve got to keep my chocolate waves intact).
  • Softsoap Coconut Scrub — Nothing fancy here, just a simple bar of coconut soap that’s studded with sandy exfoliants. It softens the skin but is created for everyday use.
  • St. Ives Coconut Milk & Orchid Extract Body Lotion — Again, nothing fancy here! I love the light scent of coconut, mixed with the floral nodes of the orchid. I use this lotion all year long, and during the summer months, I like to add a dime-sized drop of sunless tanner to a few pumps of regular lotion to give myself a light glow.
  • Coconut Bay, by Yankee Candle — Okay, I know this isn’t a body product, but I love this candle! I even have the air freshener in my car, and it makes me feel like I’m right on the beach, even when I’m driving to work.

White Denim

Bright white lights.

Bright white lights.

I know, it seems small, but each year, I look forward to when it’s socially acceptable to pull out my white jeans (and white white-leg trousers). White jeans, paired with a navy tank, and some gold jewelry makes me feel like a sailor, and nothing makes me happier than the thought of that. I especially love the destroyed, cropped white denim — am I stuck in the 80s? I just love this look!

Speaking of fashion, I also loved colored jeans, and am currently searching for the perfect pair of mint skinnies. A good denim vest is also on my personal wish list, as I think it’s the perfect thing to put over a maxi dress this season.

And finally, a summer outfit really isn’t complete without a great pair of sunglasses. Honestly, sunglasses really used to bother me in years passed, but lately, I can’t go anywhere without a pair. I’m not into designer shades, but I stocked up on a few cheap aviators (one has leopard print down the sides) and I love them!

Summer Reads

Summer is the perfect season to get lost in a book (okay, so is winter), but I feel like the warmer months produce great beach reads and hot romance novels.

I can recall many great days, lounging in the sun with a good book in my hands. There’s just no better way to relax! Here are some of summer’s hottest (supposed) reads:

  • Friendswood by Rene Steinke — A big, moving novel of one tight-knit Texas community and the events that alter its residents’ lives forever.
  • The Last Magazine by Michael Hastings — The year is 2002. Weekly newsmagazines dominate the political agenda in New York and Washington. A young journalist named Michael M. Hastings is a twenty-two- year-old intern at The Magazine, wet behind the ears, the only one in the office who’s actually read his coworker’s books. 
  • Save the Date by Jen Doll — In Save the Date, Jen Doll charts the course of her own perennial wedding guesthood, from the ceremony of distant family members when she was eight to the recent nuptials of a new boyfriend’s friends.
  • The Vacationers by Emma Straub — An irresistible, deftly observed novel about the secrets, joys, and jealousies that rise to the surface over the course of an American family’s two-week stay in Mallorca.

Americana Nails

Be the captain of the sea

Be the captain of the sea

Not to push the issue, but Christian Dior is on point with this nail polish set for summer 2014 — that bright blue? Yes, please! And of course, each bottle comes complete with “CD” nail stickers, because branding your nails is completely necessary at this point.

Here are some other great nail lacquers for the upcoming season: Haute in the Heat by Essie, Life Gave Me Lemons by OPIFierce no Fear by Essie, Down to the Core-al by OPIStrut Your Stuff by Essie, Marjorie by JulepRoarrrrrange by Essie 

I hope you’ve got a great summer planned! Let me know what some of your seasonal favorites are!

Girls in White Dresses.

...And blue satin sashes...

…And blue satin sashes…

The winner from Tuesday’s giveaway is posted below, if you’re interested…

Last weekend, I finished reading, “Girls in White Dresses” by Jennifer Close, a book that’s been on my reading list for awhile (I think it’s been years).

Here is what Amazon says about the book:

     Isabella, Mary, and Lauren feel like everyone they know is getting married. On Sunday after Sunday, at bridal shower after bridal shower, they coo over toasters, collect ribbons and wrapping paper, eat minuscule sandwiches and cakes. They wear pastel dresses and drink champagne by the case, but amid the celebration these women have their own lives to contend with: Isabella is working a dead-end job, Mary is dating a nice guy with an awful mother, and Lauren is waitressing at a midtown bar and wondering why she’s attracted to the sleazy bartender. 

     With a wry sense of humor, Jennifer Close brings us through those thrilling, bewildering years of early adulthood as she pulls us inside the circle of these friends, perfectly capturing the wild frustrations and soaring joys of modern life.

Look, I don’t like giving bad reviews of things, but I do like to be honest (I want you to trust me, after all). And, although I really got into this book, it wasn’t quite like that description.

There is only one scene that’s really like that — where the women are miserable at a bridal shower. And it was relatable, we’ve all been there.

What I DID like about the book is that it’s the story of four different women, in their late twenties, and they are surrounded by women who are either engaged, married, or having children. And although these women are often dating, they’re not sure if they’re in the relationship that’s going to end up in marriage.

And as someone who has been there, who’s going to be there for probably awhile, it’s a tough place to be, and it’s good to know there are more people like that out there… even if they are fictitious characters!

Other books by Jennifer Close: The Smart One — The Coffey siblings are having a rough year. Martha is thirty and working at J. Crew after a spectacular career flameout; Claire has broken up with her fiancé and locked herself in her New York apartment until her bank account looks as grim as her mood; and the baby of the family, Max, is dating a knockout classmate named Cleo and keeping a very big, very life-altering secret. The only solution—for all of them—is to move back home. 

…Sounds like I need to read that one, too!

Alright, so Tuesday I hosted my very first giveaway! I used the random number generator at Random.org to choose the winner:

Screen Shot 2014-06-18 at 10.15.40 PM

So… comment #3 is Beth! Beth, if you’re reading this, email me at Wittywriter7@gmail and we’ll work out the details of getting the book to you. If you didn’t win, I’m going to do another giveaway next week (with a different prize), so keep on trying! Thank you all so much for being loyal readers.

Celeb Crush: Ryan Reynolds.

Um, hi perfect body.

Um, hi perfect body.

Last weekend, I was flipping channels, searching for something I could get lost in for awhile (one of my favorite hobbies), when I came across the movie, “Definitely, Maybe,” starring the one and only Hottie With A Body, Ryan Reynolds.

Good Lord, that man is fwwiiiinnne.

Aside from boy band crushes, Mr. Reynolds might just be my original celeb crush, as I loved watching him on the sitcom “Two Guys, A Girl and a Pizza Place” (1998-2001).

I remember getting the Adidas sneakers, white with three patent orange stripes on the sides, because he had them. Because that would have totally made him fall in love with my 8th grade self, provided we ran into each other on the street.

I have always dreamt big.

Some other movies you might recognize him from include Green Lantern, Smokin’ Aces, Just Friends, Van Wilder, The Proposal, and Buried, among many others.

Many people do know that he’s currently married to the beautiful Blake Lively, but did you know that he was previously married to musical badass, Alanis Morissette, as well as large-lipped Scar-Jo?

Yep.

People Magazine has a nice timeline with all the details, just for you.

I’ll leave you with another beautiful picture of Mr. Reynolds, looking fine as hell, and just because I love you (and him) — click the pic to watch episode one, from season one of “Two Guys, A Girl and a Pizza Place.”

If I could just...

If I could just…

We might be too proud to admit it as guys, but we still need to learn how to manage responsibility, how to face our challenges.

—Ryan Reynolds

Lessons of ‘The Mary Tyler Moore Show’

You're gonna make it after all...

You’re gonna make it after all…

Boy do I love curling up on my couch for a self-made marathon of “The Mary Tyler Moore Show,” built using my collections of seasons on DVD.

“The Mary Tyler Moore Show” ran for seven seasons, beginning in 1970 — a time when America was going through political change, and women were beginning to experience economic freedom. Feminism was spreading, women were granted the right to vote, and in 1973, women were granted the right to an abortion.

But as the show premiered, the idea of women having freedom was new, so a show about a girl — a single girl — moving out on her own to establish a career was a fresh idea. “The Mary Tyler Moore Show” was the “Sex and the City” of its time.

Starring Mary Tyler Moore (obviously), Valerie Harper (Rhoda), Cloris Leachman (Phyllis), Ted Knight (Ted Baxter), Edward Asner (Lou), and Gavin MacLeod (Murray), the show is centered around Mary and her adventures in working and dating.

What I love about the show is that, aside from its already shocking plot (single woman on her own!!!), the show covers issues that are relevant today, even 40 years later, including equal pay for women, premarital sex, addiction, homosexuality, divorce, infidelity, prostitution, death, adoption, infertility, and heart health.

Here are a few things I’ve learned while watching “The Mary Tyler Moore Show”:

  • Alcohol at work should totally be allowed. Mary’s boss, Lou Grant, is known to keep a bottle of scotch in his bottom desk drawer, and take a swig when times get stressful. That’s a smart man.
  • Sleeping on a pullout sofa bed can be glamorous. Mary’s one-room apartment is cute with its tiny kitchen, dining table, and barely-there closet, leaving Mary to sleep on a pull out bed every night. Yet her place is never messy!
  • Working in the news business is cool. Okay, so Mary’s office isn’t anything special, but at the time, a room full of typewriters and clocks, complete with a coffee pot? BAMF.
  • You’re gonna make it after all. Although Mary dates a few people throughout the show’s entirety, she remains single. And you know what? I think it’s pretty badass. I need more single women role models in my life, and so what if one of them is on a TV show thats 40 years old.

If you want to check out the show for yourself, there’s a ton of episodes on YouTube. Click the pic to get started!

Photo from Time magazine, which named MTM as a show with one of the best pilots ever.

Photo from Time magazine, which named MTM as a show with one of the best pilots ever.

Well I just wanted to let you know that sometimes I get concerned about being a career woman. I get to thinking that my job is too important to me. And I tell myself that the people I work with are just the people I work with. But last night I thought what is family anyway? It’s the people who make you feel less alone and really loved.

—Mary Tyler Moore, as Mary Richards 

Pic of the Week.

Yes, I snuck in my own salted caramel corn.

Yes, I snuck in my own salted caramel corn.

Yes! I saw The Fault in Our Stars this weekend!

After reading the book, and then seeing the previews, I was seriously counting down the days until the movie hit theatres. Although it’s out of character for me, I didn’t go to the midnight premiere, but I did see it on Sunday, and the theatre was full of fans.

#TFIOS

#TFIOS

I arrived at the theatre early, worried it might be sold out, packed my caramel corn, a book, and a pile of tissues. Before seeing the movie i’d heard both sides: one person told me the movie butchered the book, while another told me that the author, John Green, was present for all of the filming, and he was pleased with the film.

I wasn’t too worried — if the author liked the film, I figured I would, too.

Going into any film that’s adapted from a book is a little nerve-wracking. If you loved the book, there’s a big chance you won’t like the movie. After all, they can’t be exactly the same, right?

While some movies based on books I’ve seen have been really different, that doesn’t necessarily mean they were bad. Take for example Nicholas Sparks’ Safe Haven. The book is very different from the movie, yet I love both of them!

I won’t give away any spoilers, but I will say the movie is a tad different from the book when it comes to The Fault in Our Stars. However, it’s not different by much. And it’s a phenomenal movie.

What I loved about the book and the movie, is the story in general. It’s a love story that’s a testament to our time. We live in a world where people have cancer. And some of those people are young; and they face challenges that many of us have known, but only through others.

It’s eye-opening.

And, if you didn’t love Augustus Waters in the book, you’ll still fall in love with him on the big screen.

I can’t say enough just how great this movie is. When I left the theatre, I felt new. And that’s happened just a few other times in my life — once being after I saw Extremely Loud & Incredibly Close.

Anyway. TFIOS. See this movie. And then call me.

You have a choice in this world, I believe, about how to tell sad stories, and we made the funny choice.

—Hazel Grace, The Fault in Our Stars

Rock a Red Lip, Like a Boss.

Keep calm, and red lipstick on...

Keep calm, and red lipstick on…

While I do have an extensive collection of makeup, including lip wear, I have a really bad habit of leaving my lips out of the makeup party — I’m never really sure what color to wear, and then there’s that whole mess of it on my coffee mug in the mornings, and my wine glass in the evenings.

But I realize having a colorful lip will accent my whole look, so in an effort to utilize the collection of lipsticks, stains, and glosses that I’ve already got, here’s a little how-to (for me and you).

WHAT SHADE LOOKS BEST ON YOU

Lauren Conrad's guide to red lip color

Lauren Conrad’s guide to red lip color

Wearing red lipstick is nothing new — in fact, it’s classic. But it’s becoming insanely popular again, giving me the confidence to actually use the few shades of red in my collection. But different shades look good on different people, so here’s the crash course on colors.

— Fair skin: Go with coral-based reds (check out Color Me Coral by Mary Kay, Coral Flash by Mirabella).

— Medium skin: Use true reds, and/or pink-cranberry shades (try Really Red by Mary Kay, Red by MAC, La Vie En Rose by Paul & Joe, Continuous Cranberry by Mabellline)

— Dark skin: Stick with deep, rich colors such as brick and burgundy (check out Wild Thing by IMAN, Red Velvet by Revlon, Black Rose by Manic Panic)

If you’re daring, or just not sure, try a red lip palette to see which shade looks best with your skin (or just mix and match). Try the MAC Pro Lip Palette, Sleek Makeup Lip 4 Palette (in Tease or Siren), or Mineral Shine Lip Palette by Everface.

ON TEXTURE: MATTE, GLOSS, VELVET?

Matte, meaning “not shiny,” are most of what you see on celebrities lately — while glossy lips are said to be stuck in the 80s. But you know what? I love a glossy lip!

If you want a matte look, it’s best to choose a lipstick that actually has “Matte” in the name, just to be certain. You can also try out a new lip texture called “Velvet” — it will say Velvet finish — which gives the matte appearance, but goes on like a gloss. Velvet lipstick is said to dry weightless and have long-lasting wear.

If you’re looking for the best bang for your buck, get a matte red lipstick and a red gloss — wear both when you’re feeling saucy, or just go for the matte when you’re on trend.

A red gloss alone probably won’t give you that standout BAM! thing you’re going for. Here are some great red glosses to check out, to wear over your lipstick, or even over your stain or crayon.

A lip stain gives the appearance of just-bitten lips — very sexy. It comes in a liquid form, sometimes in a tube or a felt-tip marker. Some stains can be used on the lips and cheeks. The stain is going to provide a naturally matte look, unless of course you apply a gloss over it.

Lip crayons are said to have all the great things about lip color rolled right into one, housing color, sheen, and moisturizing properties, all while remaining easy to apply (something I can’t really say about lipstick).

…I kind of thinking I’m SOLD on the stain or the crayon — never tried either!

HOW TO APPLY, WEAR

All the essentials...

All the essentials…

Now that you’ve picked the perfect red to go with your skin (and style), and you’ve got a texture to be excited over, let’s get this lip rockin’!

Start by prepping the lips. Use a lip scrub (try Fabulips by Bliss or make your own with a little honey and sugar) or simply use your toothbrush to rid your lips of any rough patches — we want a smooth application here. 

Next, apply a good lip balm (not a gloss), even Chapstick is okay here, and let it soak in for a minute. 

This is when you would apply liner, but that’s totally unnecessary. If you’re worried about the lipstick bleeding away from your lip use concealer around your mouth to ensure everything stays in place. 

Next, apply the red. If you’re using a lipstick or a crayon, fill in the lips first with short strokes. Using a stain? Apply that now. Blot with a tissue. 

Then, apply a second coat of color. 

Next, if you want to top with a gloss, do so, or top with a balm if you used a stain. 

Finally, place your index finger in your mouth, purse your lips around it and pull your finger out to prevent any chance of color on your teeth. 

Other good things to keep in mind when wearing red lips? While it’s not a must, it is a good idea to dial down other makeup. You can still have eyeshadow and all the normal stuff, just don’t go for the black smokey eye along with the red lip — unless you’re performing on stage. No, seriously.

As far as clothing goes, you CAN go matchy-matchy, or total opposite (sexy black dress, sexy red lip), and it’s definitely okay to rock your red lips at the office, or when meeting the gals for lunch.

I don’t know about you, but I’m definitely feeling confident about my red lip look and I’m ready to show it off. Now, where is that little black book?

Host the Perfect Brunch.

Spring brunch menu from Saveur

Spring brunch menu from Saveur

Wow, do I love a good brunch. I’m lucky enough to live in a city that’s got dozens of great brunch spots, but I’ve always had a little dream of hosting one myself.

The thing is, it seems like such a huge ordeal — what to serve for food? What about drinks? How fancy should it be? Yadda, yadda, yadda. Well, after scouring the interwebs (pretty much my favorite thing to do), I’ve got some ideas and tips for you!

BRUNCH MENU OPTIONS

Ricotta & Asparagus Quiche

Ricotta & Asparagus Quiche

The cool thing about brunch is that it’s breakfast AND lunch, so you can choose one or the other, or you can have a little bit of both. I looked for recipes that combined sweet breakfast foods with savory lunch items.

Basil Prosecco & Lemoncello

Basil Prosecco & Lemoncello

You could serve a few of these, or pick a main dish (such as the Strata) and have some sides (fruit, eggs, and bacon) — having plenty of options is the key here.

Lots of items you could purchase ready-made, i.e. a fruit plate/salad, lox platter and bagels, and then toss together an egg casserole and you’re good to go!

BRUNCH COCKTAILS

While I love to eat, brunch isn’t brunch without a proper cocktail (which doesn’t always have to be alcoholic). It’s always great to have the basics: bloody Marys, mimosas (traditional is champagne plus orange juice), coffee, etc.

But you can also make your own cocktail, say a giant pitcher of something refreshing?

Here are some cool drink recipes I found:

I also came across a cool, rather easy idea: create a mimosa bar! Have bottles of bubbly (or sparkling cider, or soda water) on ice and then container of different juices. Here are some ideas on how to build your own mimosa bar.

Chevron Salad Servers

Chevron Salad Servers

BRUNCH DETAILS

Depending on why you’re having a brunch — hosting a bridal party, a baby shower, or celebrating a promotion — you may want to cutesy it up a little, or maybe just keep it casual for you and your friends and family. I really need new plates and glasses, so I went on a hunt for some of those, and some other cute things that will make your brunch (or everyday) special. 

Doesn’t seem so bad now, does it? I hope I’ve inspired you to host a brunch — even if it’s just for your family! Perhaps one of these recipes will make for a good Sunday morning, even if it’s just a simple breakfast. If you’ve got other brunch ideas, please share them! Cheers!

Pic of the Week.

Take a shot...

Take a shot…

This shot glass has been sitting on my counter for weeks — because what are you supposed to do with a gift someone that you thought was boyfriend-potential got you, and then stops talking to you? The options are as follows:

  • Throw it against the wall, hoping it shatters into a billion pieces
  • Drop it from a second-story window
  • Wrap it up for the company white elephant Christmas gift exchange in 6 months
  • Put it on a shelf
  • Fill it with whiskey, shoot it, and hate yourself

Let me explain.

Boston and I were set up by a mutual friend of ours. Our first date was a blind date, and I was pleasantly surprised, as he was handsome, funny, and very polite (#Winning). We went on two great dates, and then Boston headed on a trip… to Boston, to visit a childhood friend.

He asked me what kind of souvenir I wanted. While getting me a gift was completely too kind, I told him that I collect tacky shot glasses from different cities. He thought I was kidding and asked me again.

I was serious. I really do have a shelf in my kitchen dedicated to the tackiest shot glasses I’ve found in this country. So, he returned with said shot glass.

He gave it to me on date #3, when I went to visit him at his home in New Orleans. We went to dinner, and then went out for handcrafted cocktails. When we went back to his place, he asked me if I wanted to stay over.

I did.

Following Patti's rules...

Following Patti’s rules…

Following one of Patti Stanger’s rules — no sex until monogamy — I kept it clean. But sleeping next to someone new is always another step forward, if you ask me.

The next morning, as I drove back to Baton Rouge, I was thinking a lot about the weeks leading up to that morning. I was blown away. Here was a man who had his shit together, was fit and sexy, had a great sense of humor, lived in a cute little house, and was quick to compliment me.

It was really great. While I wanted to take things slow, I also wanted to know if he was dating to eventually get to a relationship, or just dating to date… and I was prepping myself to ask him about it on date #4.

But he never asked me on that date.

Despite a great date, he was acting distant toward me once he returned home from Boston. I know, it sounds weird, because I’d only known him a few weeks, but something was off.

And I started questioning myself… am I asking for too much? How much can I expect him to call/text me when it’s a new relationship-ish thing?

But I felt like he was giving me the fade, and I’ve had that happen to me way too many times, and I wasn’t going to let it happen again. So, I called him on it and asked him if something was up. He told me that it had nothing to do with me and that his work had been crazy since he got back.

I didn’t think that was the truth, and even if it was, it pissed me off. I’ve dated many-a-dude obsessed with working, and that whole excuse gets old.

But, he called me the following night and told me that during his trip, he visited his ex.

Love. This. Song.

Love. This. Song.

Oh, that. The ex factor.

This ex told him that she hated her current boyfriend, and that since she figured out that she wasn’t going to be in love, instead she would focus on her career.

Sounds great to me, what’s the problem?

The problem was he felt guilty. Apparently really guilty. So guilty that he stopped talking to me.

I was (and still am) crushed. I know it was only a few dates, but damn! Why’d it have to end because of that? It made me upset; I felt like I wasn’t enough to get him to push his ex from his mind. I felt sad that something good was ending and I couldn’t do anything to stop it.

And I felt mad at his ex for making him feel bad. An entire coast away, and she ruined it.

I’ve gone back and forth in mind with different scenarios — if he called, what would I say? Would he apologize and want to make it right? Or would he give me the “It’s not you, it’s me” speech?

I can’t judge. I’ve got exes, too. Bad ones. And if I saw them, talked to them (that would never happen), then I’d probably lose my shit for a few days.

But, I can only react to what has happened, and what’s happened is his ex. And then a whole bunch of quiet.

And in those times of quiet, I try to stay really, really busy, so that I don’t have time to think about it and so my hands stay busy to keep from texting those I shouldn’t.

It’s a bitch of a cycle.

And so, I decided to keep my Boston shot glass (for now) and any time someone comes to my apartment because their guy or girl pissed them off, they MUST take a shot from it.

It’s not the outcome I hoped for, but I’ll deal with the one I got.

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