I’ve had a crush on this guy, Brian, for more than10 years. He went to my high school, and last year we reconnected.
He lives in Indiana, and we had a date night when I was in town last summer. It was fantastic. I’d be lying if I said I didn’t wonder about the potential of a serious relationship with him.
After our date, we continued to keep in touch. I sent him cards in the mail, we read a book together (and called it “Book Club”), and made plans to meet up again in May.
Around Valentine’s Day, he confessed he wished we were able to celebrate together. Uncharacteristically, he apologized and told me he knew he hadn’t been the nicest person to me, and he appreciated my company.
He even told me that he checked his phone every day to see if I’d texted him. It was very sweet and I was touched.
I asked him if he’d be interested in having a “FaceTime date,” so we could see each other. He said yes.
The day of our date, he said a work friend had come in town and wanted to do dinner. I said we could reschedule. He asked if I was mad, and I said, “Of course not.”
His friend was a guy, but I told him if he’d have ditched me for a girl I might have been a little jealous.
Brian didn’t reply, but I didn’t think much about it.
The next day, about an hour before our FaceTime date, Brian sent me a text saying he didn’t want to talk to me, ever.
“Your text freaked me out,” he said. “We aren’t even dating and yet I will date other women.”
I tried to explain that I was just playing; I never thought or said we were dating; and we were both certainly allowed to date anyone.
But my text went ignored. I had done something so terrible, it didn’t even deserve a response.
Honestly, I get rejected all the time. The time I spend fretting over it is relative to how much I cared.
This time, I crawled into bed when the sun was still out, and I cried.
In the midst of my blubbering, I started to wonder, why are we so quick to cut people out of our lives?
Sure, I pissed Brian off. But was it something bad enough to warrant The Ice Age treatment?
I don’t know why he told me all that sweet stuff and then closed the door on me, only weeks later.
It seems like he was trying to tell me he was dating someone else, but why not just say that?
Because of the way he left things, I’ve got no closure, and only speculation.
A few weeks ago, I went to the midnight premier of the latest Nicholas Sparks’ movie, “The Longest Ride,” and one of the main characters said something to the effect of, how sometimes the people we are closest to can become absolute strangers.
I’ve dated a lot of people that have just fallen off the face of the Earth. And I understand that’s the risk when we get close to people. But it makes me sad.
As I get older, I realize just how little time we have. The days and weeks are flying by and we can’t find it in our hearts to give someone a second chance?
Note: this idea does not apply to any situation that includes abuse, addiction, or infidelity.
I doubt I’ll hear from Brian again, and my closure will just have to be the confirmation that he’s not the one. I need someone who’s willing to forgive.
Alright, I’m going to admit that I’m really bad about this whole “Introducing the significant other to your friends” thing.
In the past, I get really excited when I meet a new guy and we start hanging out (who doesn’t?), and I want him to meet my friends, whom I love so much. I don’t mean for it to be a serious thing, although it is a good idea to see if he fits in with the crowd.
What ends up happening is that it doesn’t work out with the guy, we stop talking, and my friends (or I) never see him again. And I’m left feeling like a big jackass because I just introduced a guy to my friends who ultimately was a blip on my life’s radar.
My friends have assured me that I shouldn’t feel like a jackass — they’ve been single, too, and they know how it goes. I still feel stupid.
In my recent dating adventures, I told myself that I wasn’t going to introduce a guy I’m seeing/talking to anyone, until things are serious — as in, we’re exclusive, and in order for THAT to happen, we have to have been talking for at least three months.
I know, rules. But if I don’t crack the whip, I’m just going to stay single forever, right? I still might ;)
Anyway, I did a little Google searching to see what the interwebs had to say about the matter, and I found a few things.
For starters, YourTango.com suggests that meeting the friends too early can actually put pressure on your FRIENDS, because they feel like they’re pressured to make relationship decisions for you. I’m not sure if this is true, but… they do suggest waiting to introduce a guy until you’ve been on at least three dates (duh) and to keep it casual for the first meeting.
I found some decent advice on April Beyer’s website, which suggested asking yourself WHY you’re introducing your girl/guy to your friends — approval? Locking in the idea that you’re a couple? April suggests waiting until it feels natural, which sounds like a solid idea.
It’s safe to say it’ll be awhile before I introduce a guy to my friends, if I’m ever that lucky. But when I do, I’ll make sure I’m doing it for the right reasons.
Hello my LOVELY readers! This has certainly been another crazy busy week for the books, but I always feel so good after I’ve conquered a packed week, what about you?
While I’ve still got to work this weekend, I’m looking forward to sleeping in tomorrow (getting up at 6am everyday is truly for the birds)!
This week’s scent for Fresh Friday is Lovely by Sarah Jessica Parker. Now I know a lot of people are against the whole celebrity-scent thing, and while I can see why, I don’t really mind it. If I had access to the people to make my own scent, I definitely would! Market what you’ve got, folks!
I’ve had my bottle of Lovely for a few years, and while it’s a light scent, it’s not something I would recommend for everyday wear.
According to Fragrantica, “The fragrance was a crowd-pleaser, with an advertising campaign that made extensive use of Parker’s voice and personal image. It won a Fifi award in 2006 for Best National Ad Campaign. The success of this first fragrance has led to a continuing partnership, which has produced Covet (2007), a trio of companion scents—Twlight, Dawn and Endless (2009), limited editions of Lovely and Covet, and the newest launches, SJP NYC (2009) and SJP NYC Pure Crush (2011).
Designer Sarah Jessica Parker has 9 perfumes in our fragrance base. The earliest edition was created in 2005 and the newest is from 2011. Sarah Jessica Parker fragrances were made in collaboration with perfumers Ann Gottlieb, Frank Voelkl, Stephen Nilsen, Yann Vasnier, Clement Gavarry, Laurent Le Guernec and Honorine Blanc.”
Sounds like I need to hop to it and smell some of her other scents! Lovely is known for its notes of mandarin, rosewood, lavender, apple martini and bergamot. The heart is of orchid, patchouli and finishes off to cedar, white amber, woods and musk. Yum!
Have you tried any of Parker’s other scents?
Thursday night, I could not wait to finish with work, jump into my sweats and walk right on over to the movie theatre for the midnight premier of “The Longest Ride,” a film adaptation of the Nicholas Sparks bestseller.
I was really excited for several reasons: 1. the book was fantastic. I have very, very fond memories of laying out on my terrace, getting a tan, sipping on a wine spritzer (no, seriously), and falling in love with this unique story, 2. SCOTT EASTWOOD IS FINE, and 3. I allowed myself a cheat and got a junior popcorn, with butter.
But seriously, that second point needs to be mentioned one more time… because how have I not noticed him nor his hotness before now?
Anyway, “The Longest Ride” is the story of two couples — very similar couples — in different time periods, whose lives intersect in a very unique way.
The movie and the book tells both of their stories, while in turn, offering a tale of love… as only Nicholas Sparks could. Read more about the book from a previous blog post, here.
I think this movie struck me in an interesting way, because some of the issues in the story are easily things that could happen to anyone. Lately, I’ve been having a lot of questions and uncertainty when I think about love and my future. The movie touched on those issues, and although it was a little overwhelming at midnight on a Thursday, it was cathartic.
While I’ve seen all of the movies and read nearly all of Sparks’ books, this one is definitely one of my favorites (I just love “The Last Song”). I don’t, and won’t, spoil the movie for you, but per usual, don’t forget to pack the Kleenex!
Whew, made it to Friday! I feel like every week is a complete roller coaster — it starts one way, and ends up completely different.
On Mondays, I always feel so overwhelmed when I look at my to-do list for the week. I often wake up SUPER early on Mondays and stay up late to get a jump start on the week. By Tuesday, I’m thinking the week will be a complete breeze after everything I accomplished Monday.
And the remainder of the week is spent tying up loose ends… and basically answering a TON of emails. By Friday, I’m just happy to see the weekend; which is something I don’t understand because I’m usually working more on the weekends than I am during the week!
Nonetheless, it is Friday, and I cannot believe I’ve made it through this many Fresh Fridays without mentioning Versace’s Bright Crystal. This is a scent I’ve worn over the years — one that I was surprised I liked so much! But it’s definitely a go-to.
As described by Sephora, “Inspired by a mixture of Donatella Versace’s favorite floral fragrances, Bright Crystal is a fresh, sensual blend of refreshing chilled yuzu and pomegranate mingled with soothing blossoms of peony, magnolia, and lotus flower, warmed with notes of musk and amber.”
No wonder I love it — it’s got musk AND floral notes! Perfection.
What’s everyone doing for the weekend? As usual, follow me on Instagram, Twitter, and SnapChat @OrangeJulius7 to see what me (and Blanche) can stir up until we see you right back here, on Monday!
Although shade no. 7 is a gloss — I just cannot pull myself away. I blame this completely on Bonne Bell, for getting me addicted to shiny, glitter glosses delivered to my lips via sponge applicator.
Girl Next Door by Hard Candy is sheer, with a touch of silvery shimmer. It doesn’t have a scent or a flavor, really, but it is a tiny bit sweet. Mega plus? It’s thick, stays on for awhile, and it’s a lip plumper.
I can never REALLY tell if these things work, but I love the idea of it, regardless. But it did get me wondering how they work? I went to Google for the answer, and there was WebMD to my rescue.
According to WebMD, some over-the-counter lip plumping products contain ingredients that cause blood to flow to the lips, such as cinnamon, ginger mint, or wintergreen. When blood flows to the lips, they appear slightly larger than normal, or “bee stung” for a few hours.
Hey, that sounds pretty good to me!
I like to use Girl Next Door as a “top coat” to some of the other pink lipsticks I’ve mentioned before. It shines up a lipstick, plus adds the plump. Best of both worlds!